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WHAT HAPPENED, THIS WEEK, @ WWE RAW

Posted April 22nd, 2015 by jshannon

Randy Orton won’t be able to use his RKO on Sunday. So, he had a plan to make up for it…tonight.

The show opened with a look at the Randy Orton and Seth Rollins matches from last week. The winner or winners would get to set a stipulation for the World title match. Orton won his match without question. Kane took a dive for Seth to make sure Rollins would be on equal footing. Seth chose that Randy could not use the RKO. Orton decided that they needed to fight…in a steel cage…to neutralize The Authority.

The steel cage hung high above the ring. Welcome to Albany, NY. Randy Orton emerged from the back. The cage was lowered as Randy made his way to the ring. The announcers discussed the upcoming World title match and they were split on their predictions. Randy called Seth “One Dumb B*stard”. Randy knew that Seth made a mistake by taking away the RKO. Randy’s greatest weapon is not the RKO, it is the brutality that he is able to unleash on an opponent. Randy promised to break Seth’s jaw to shut Rollins up. Randy suggested that he just might break one or more ribs. Randy also knew that Seth’s World title reign was going to end on Sunday.

That brought out Seth, along with J and J Security. Seth noticed that Randy has an Anger Problem. Randy corrected him that it was a Seth Rollins Problem. Seth explained that he was a Master of Human Chess. Seth crowed about how great he is. Seth said he was “That much better” than Randy Orton. Seth wasn’t worried about the steel cage or the lack of Authority members. Seth told Randy to get it all out of his system. Randy said he would RKO “Every Son of a B*tch that I See”. He also promised to RKO Seth before the end of the night.

Dean Ambrose vs Luke Harper

Luke spoke! Luke told Dean that he was about to Fear Luke Harper. The two threw wild Haymakers to open. Crossbody by Dean led to several punches and a Running Bulldog. Thrust Kick by Harper. Dean ran Luke right out of the ring. Suicide Dive by Dean. Dean ripped apart the Spanish Announce Table. Luke tossed Dean over the barricade. The fight went right out into the crowd. They finally made it back to ringside. Dean flew off the barricade but took an Uppercut by Harper. Clothesline by Dean. The fight went up the ramp as the ref threw it out. Lawn Dart into the LED board rocked Dean to his core. Harper threw Dean off the stage and headed to the back. Dean started to chase him but stopped.

Your Winner: Double Count-Out
Raw Ranking; 1.0 out of a possible 5

Seth, Jamie and Joey were walking backstage. The Prime Time Players surprised The Authority. Seth was ready to wipe the floor with the next person he saw. That was Triple H but Seth suddenly seemed so willing to fight. Seth had issues with Kane and wanted HHH to deal with him. HHH said he had more on his plate than just dealing with Kane. HHH promised to deal with the Kane situation, shortly. Seth asked for more security to help with Randy Orton. HHH smiled and said “It’s One Guy”.

Lucha Dragons vs New Day
Number One Contender Match to the Tag Team Titles

Big E and Kofi Kingston were the competitors for their trio. Sin Cara and Kofi kicked off the match. Big E took the tag before the first move. Big E threw Kalisto, who had tagged in, to the ropes. Big E blocked the first Tilt-a-Whirl Head Scissors but hit the 2nd one. Sin Cara tagged back in as the tag champs looked on, via television. Shoulder Tackle to Kofi, who was back legal. Springboard Arm Drag by Sin Cara. Knife Edge Chop but Kofi came back with a Tornado DDT. Sin Cara sailed at Kofi but sailed between the ropes. Xavier Woods distracted Sin Cara, which allowed a Slider Dropkick to the floor. Double Team by New Day.

Whip Dropkick Combo by New Day. The “New Day Sucks” chant grew in intensity. Big E dropped Sin Cara as Raw went to break.

Kofi hit a Dropkick as the show returned. Kofi pounded away on Sin Cara. Tag to Big E. Back Roll by Sin Cara. Kalisto with a Sringboard onto Kofi, who tagged in. Corkscrew Crossbody by Kalisto. Seated Headscissors DDT by Kalisto. Big E made the save. Kalisto flipped Kofi to the floor. Tag to Sin Cara. Moonsaults to the floor by both Luchas. The ref started the count. Kofi got in but Xavier held Sin Cara’s leg to keep him on the floor.

Your Winne (by Count Out): New Day
Raw Ranking: 3.0 (points deducted for lousy ending)

Randy Orton rushed in and threw Big E out to the floor. He then hit RKOs on both Kofi Kingston and Xavier Woods. Big E would not come in to aid his partners. That just might cost them on Sunday.

Raw looked at the Roman Reigns and Big Show issue. Roman insulted Big Show for being a lackey to The Authority. Big Show attacked Roman and Chokeslammed him on top of a British Taxi Cab. That happened after Show had thrown Roman into the side of the car, a couple of times. Big Show and Roman Reigns will fight, Sunday, in a Last Man Standing Match. This is one tough match for me to call. Will need to think on it for a day or two.

Fandango vs Curtis Axel

Axel did a little dance but the fans were solidly behind Fandango. Go Behind by Fandango but Axel broke free and pounded away. Dropkick by Axel. Axel ripped off his t-shirt, in the style of Hulk Hogan. Fandango rolled up the posing Axel for a two. Nice Dropkick and Clotheslines by Fandango. Leg Sweep by Fandango. Michinoku Suplex into Last Dance!

Your Winner: Fandango
Raw Ranking: 2.5

Triple H came out with a major announcement. HHH took his time to absorb the love/hate from the fans. HHH began his segment by praising Seth Rollins for being the Future of the WWE. HHH was ready to find “The Next Seth Rollins”. Tough Enough will return on June 21st. HHH really pushed how it would feel to become a WWE Superstar. HHH told the fans to send their videos to WWEToughEnough.com to qualify. 10 men and 5 women will compete for one spot each (gender). I’d put my vote in for a young man named Ryan McQueen.

Kane came out to interrupt this segment. HHH did not look happy that Kane crashed the party. Kane didn’t get any replies to his e-mails and text messages. HHH gave Kane time to cool down. Kane stepped down as Director of Operations by way of a Two Week Notice. HHH wanted to sit down and talk with Kane about this. Seth came running out and questioned Kane’s comment about Seth not being worth the investment. Seth asked HHH to dispatch Kane. HHH tried to stop this argument but they kept going. Kane shrieked at Seth that he was only a champ because The Authority made the decision to back Seth. HHH went off on both Kane and Seth for the way they were handling themselves in the public eye. HHH appreciated Kane’s loyalty. HHH made Kane “Guardian of the Gate” for the Steel Cage Match at Extreme Rules. Kane said he would not let HHH down. Seth could not believe that HHH would reward Kane. H HH suggested that Seth get on Kane’s good side, double quick. Kane offered a handshake and Seth took it.

Backstage, Seth talked with Kane. Seth was not happy that Kane was going to be at the cage door. HHH told them to get along. HHH reminded Kane that Kane was now a Corporate Man, not the Demon Spawn. Kane was ready to prove he was still a Monster. HHH told Seth it took a lot of people to make Seth champion, especially Kane. HHH said it was time for Seth to start appreciating those who have helped him. HHH made the match of Seth Rollins vs Dolph Ziggler. HHH wanted Seth to show the world what he already knew about Seth. Seth said he was no longer The Future…he is The Man. Not even close to replacing Ric Flair.

Naomi vs Brie Bella (w/Nikki Bella)

Naomi did an insert video about wanting to have her time as the Divas Champion. Naomi stated she was done waiting.

Collar and Elbow to the ropes. They went back to mid ring and Naomi pushed out. Naomi took Brie to the corner and wrenched Brie’s neck. Naomi then pushed Brie down and hit a Spinning Enziguri. Naomi with a Kick to the face off the top rope. European Uppercut by Naomi. Snap mare by Naomi. Paige is out of action, for an indefinite amount of time, due to Naomi’s attack, last week. Brie blasted Naomi. Naomi came out of the corner and rocked her foe. Brie hit Elbows to the face but Naomi would not be denied. Naomi with Knee Strikes to send Brie tumbling out to the floor. Break time. (How often does a Divas match bridge a commercial break?)

Front Face Lock by Naomi. Naomi kept pounding on Brie’s head and then threw her down by the hair. Rear Chin Lock by Naomi. Naomi kicked he thigh of Brie and hen slapped her around. Naomi exploded on Brie’s head and neck. He ref pulled her back. Naomi kicked away on Brie and Snap Mared Brie into a Rear Chin Lock. Brie tried to punch free but Naomi kept the fire on. Both women went for Crossbody Blocks and ended up stunned. Brie with a Flying Clothesline and Dropkick. Brie with a Knee Trembler, in the ropes. Missile Dropkick by Brie. Naomi missed a Crossbody and Brie almost pinned Naomi. Rear View by Naomi. 1-2-3.

Your Winner: Naomi
Raw Ranking: 2.75

Heath Slater talked to Erick Rowan, backstage. Heath was ready to accept the John Cena Open Challenge. He didn’t get the chance as Randy Orton laid him out with an RKO. That was 3 RKOs for Randy, so far.

Roman Reigns came through the crowd to address the Big Show issue. Raw flashed back to London, where Big Show almost destroyed Roman. Roman did not feel like talking. He was in the mood to fight…Big Show. Instead, he got the return of Bo Dallas. Sigh. Bo noticed that Roman seemed angry. Bo actually quoted Yoda. I don’t care for that quote. I prefer “Do or Do Not…There is no Try”. Bo kept insulting Roman for being such a failure. Bo wanted to change things for Roman. Bo talked about Bo-Lieving and Roman hit the Superman Punch and Spear. Roman questioned Big Show’s guts. Roman was determined to be the Last Man Standing. Roman mocked Bo’s catchphrase as he said you can Bo-Lieve That.

Dolph Ziggler was getting ready, in the back. He will battle the World Champ in the Main Event.

A promo for the new Ultimate Warrior DVD aired. I got to see Warrior (back when he was Dingo Warrior in World Class). He had an intensity and dedication that was impossible to deny.

Sheamus came out for his match. He will face Dolph Ziggler on Sunday.

Sheamus vs Zack Ryder (‘member him?)

Sheamus wanted the bell sounded. Brogue Kick. Sheamus chuckled at what he just did. Sheamus rolled Zack and bragged that he could pin Ryder. Sheamus said Zack deserved more. Sheamus somped away and kept talking to the crowd. Knee Strike and Suplex up onto the top turnbuckle. Kneelifts by Sheamus. Sheamus kept talking trash to Ryder and then pitched him over the top rope. Sheamus went out to the floor. Sheamus said the fans and Zack were the ones that look stupid. Brogue Kick, again, by Sheamus. S heamus pitched Zack into the ring and chided the crowd. Sheamus propped Zack in the corner and went for a third Brogue Kick. He didn’t get it as Dolph Ziggler rushed in and hit the Zig Zag.

Your Winner (by Disqualification): Sheamus (Really?)
Raw Ranking: .25

John Cena Open Challenge

John revved up the crowd. He took time to push his match against Rusev. John still wanted to defend his US title, against anyone with the courage to accept…

John Cena vs Kane
United States Title Match

Kane kicked away at John. Kane worked Cena’s ribs and then hit an Uppercut. Hard Whip by Kane. Kane stomped away on John, who fell out to the floor. Seth, Jamie and Joey watched all this on the monitor. Kane put John on the apron and punched away. John began to fight back until he fell to a Side Slam. Corner Shoulders by Kane. Kane with a Ches Firs Whip to the corner. John fell out to the floor.

Kane Whipped John into the barricade. Kane slid in the ring to break the count. John crawled towards the ring. John rolled in at 7. Kane stomped away on John. Suplex by Kane brought him a 2. Kane stomped John’s arm and then boxed the ribs and chest. John collapsed. 1-2-Not Yet! Pull In Shoulders by Kane. 2 count, once again. John came back with hard punches. Cena tried to go Vintage but an Uppercut stopped him. Corner Splash by Kane. Kane missed the 2nd Corner Splash. Protobomb by John Cena. As John did the hand wave, Kane Goozled John and nailed the Chokeslam. It…is…Not Over. Kane was so frustrated. Kane set for the Tombstone but Cena reversed it into the Attitude Adjustment.

Your Winner: John Cena
Raw Ranking: 2.75

Kane ran into HHH, backstage. Nothing was said but Kane was so angry.

Renee Young interviewed Miz about his match against Mizdow for the Miz Brand. Miz could not believe that Mizdow would dare to try and steal his thunder. Renee sent it to Byron Saxton and John Cena. John was amazed that Kane stepped up to face him. He was taken out, suddenly, by a chain-wielding Rusev. Rusev used the chain in a variation of the Accolade. John seemed seriously hurt.

Miz vs (Damien) Mizdow (w/Summer Rae)
Brand Ownership Match

Raw looked at how this match came to be. It was Mizdow’s idea. Miz was ready to send Mizdow back to the unemployment line and send Summer off to somewhere else.

This so reminds me of Undertaker vs Undertaker of years back. Mizdow almost got the instant roll up. Big kick by Miz led to a shot at the Reality Check. Mizdow converted it into a Backslide for two. Mizdow chased Miz. Miz with a Roll Up for two. Kicks and Punches by Miz. Miz drove his boot into Mizdow’s face. Snap Mare by Miz into a Blackout Kick. Miz went for the Full Body Clothesline but Mizdow hit the Reality Check and Kneeling DDT. Both men went for the Skull Crushing Finale. Summer Rae turned on Mizdow and allowed Miz to win.

Your Winner: Miz
Raw Ranking: 1.5

Randy Orton slid in the ring and RKO’d Miz. Cool.

Bray Wyatt cut another creepy promo.

Ryback vs Adam Rose

Ryback was a former contestant on Tough Enough (2004). Rose tried for a kick and Ryback caught the foot and threw him aside. Missile Dropkick by Rose into repeated Elbow Drops. 1 count and Rose went flying. Rose jumped on Ryback’s back. Ryback stood up and hit the Clutch Jawbreaker. Meat Hook Clothesline! Shell Shocked!

Your Winner: Ryback
Raw Ranking: 1.25

Hot Dog and Banana go in the ring and both were hit with Meat Hooks. Double Shell Shock!. Ryback has jokes.

Kane was interviewed, backstage. Renee asked Kane about the old age comments made by Seth Rollins on Social Media. Kane stormed over and was ready to destroy J and J Security and Seth. Seth apologized for his remarks about Denture Cream and Depends. Seth said he appreciated Kane’s help and dedicated his upcoming match with Dolph to Kane. Seth walked away and Randy Orton stepped into the camera’s path. He was not done stalking his prey.

Dolph Ziggler vs Seth Rollins
Non-Tile Match

Seth pounded away on Delph, at the bell. Seth then stomped away, in the corner. Dolph tossed Seth into the corner and boxed away. Funk Neckbreaker by Dolph and the Heart Breaker Elbow. Whip reversed by Dolph. La Bandera Clothesline sent both men over the top rope and to the floor. Dolph warned J and J to stay back. Dolph dropped Seth and got a two count. Excellent Suplex by Dolph for a two. Seth blocked a Dropkick and turned it into the Slingshot into the corner. Raw took one more commercial break.

Rear Chin Lock by Seth. Seth tossed Dolph down, backwards. Corner Forearm by Seth and Dolph crumbled. 2 count. Seth slapped Dolph in the head and then kicked him there. Seth clubbed Dolph’s neck. Back Drop Suplex by Seth for a two. Seth kept the pressure on Dolph. Seth went back to the Rear Chin Lock. Dolph got to his feet and nailed the Jawbreaker. Back Elbow by Dolph. Seth missed a Corner Splash. Dolph flipped out of a Back Drop SUplex and hit the Flying Clothesline. Seth kicked Dolph. Seth blocked the Flying DDT but Dolph came back and hit it anyway. Seth with a wild Enziguri for a two plus. Dolph reversed a Buckle Bomb into a Small Package. Superkick by Dolph. Sheamus rushed down to distract Dolph. Seth nailed the Buckle Bomb and Face First DDT. That’s new.

Your Winner: Seth Rollins
Raw Ranking: 2.75

Seth bragged about what he just did. He was cut off by the arrival of Triple H. HHH pushed that Seth was going to beat Randy Orton, on Sunday. Seth made the mistake of cutting off HHH. #DoubleDumb*ssOnYou. Seth started to talk trash about Kane but The Big Red Corporate Monster came out. Seth asked for the cage to be lowered to shield him from Kane. Randy Orton was inside the cage and Seth could not escape. Seth tried to climb out of the ring but Randy hit an incredible RKO after pulling Seth off the ropes. That match will be off the charts.

Peace

–Jay Shannon
WordSlingerJay@Gmail.com

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