WHAT HAPPENED, THIS WEEK, @ (TNA) IMPACT WRESTLING

Posted May 16th, 2014 by jshannon

Slammiversary is just around the corner. Eric Young isn’t happy that MVP jumped him to get himself into the main event. He wants MVP’s butt, now. Would he get it?

Eric was pacing in the parking lot. He said he just wanted to talk with MVP. The limo pulled up and Eric went after “The Boss”. Security held Eric back. Eric wanted an explanation and satisfaction. Eric screamed that he trusted MVP. That led to a video package about the whole Double Cross/Back Stabbing by MVP. MVP made it sound as if he would be facing a mystery person from the “outside”. MVP then jumped Eric and pounded him silly.

Eric Young then came out to the ring. No smiles, no joking around. He asked for the stick and got ready to vent. Eric said he was in a “real bad nightmare”. Eric said everyone wanted a change but MVP turned out to be just like all the rest. Eric promised that he wasn’t going to allow crap like MVP pulled to happen on his watch. Eric warned MVP to be careful what he wished for. Eric said he would not wait til Slammiversary to fight MVP. He called out the Director of Operations.

MVP came on the Tron and said Eric could talk all he wanted. MVP took credit for Eric winning. MVP said he had a Master Plan and Eric helped him speed up his time window. MVP talked about the true Power in wrestling. MVP said he wanted more than just to be a Pencil Pusher. MVP said he was ready to send Eric back to being a Insignificant Nobody. Eric challenged MVP to fight him, tonight. MVP said he was bullet proof but he would be bringing security to protect him. Eric left the ring and rushed to the back.

Dixie Carter and Rockstar Spud were taking a little drive. There was a sprayed table on the lawn saying “Dixie fears Bully”. Taz and Tenay ran down the night’s card.
The arrival of Bram was highlighted. Bram wants Magnus to return to the man he used to be. Bram is a brutal psycho that doesn’t hesitate to use “toys” to destroy anyone in sight.

Willow cut another weird promo. He challenged Magnus and Bram to face him in Willow’s style of battle. Please give us back Jeff Hardy. This new alter-ego just…well, sucks.

Willow waited on the stairs. Magnus came up and the fight was on.

Willow vs Magnus and Bram
2-on-1 Handicap Match

Bram jumped Willow, from behind. The Brits took the fight to the masked loony. The bell rand and Willow with wild punches. Magnus with his Powerslam. Tag to Bram. Whip to the corner. Bram choked Willow with the boot. Bram slammed Willow into the corner and tagged in Magnus. Gut Wrench Suplex by Magnus to gain a two count. Magnus punched but Willow with the Jawbreaker. Bram tagged in but got laid out with the Whisper in the Wind. Wild punches and Headbutt by Willow. Willow with the Flying Forearm. Inverted Atomic Drop into the Double Legdrop and Dropkick. Backspring Roundhouse Punch by Willow. Outer Limits Dropkick by Willow. Bram pushed out of the Twist of Fate/Hate. Bram with his unique Suplex. Tag to Magnus. Bram rolled out of the ring and went under the ring to find we used to call a Slim Jim Pry Bar (back in my days of running car repos with my ex-brother-in-law, Roy). He slid it in the ring but the former World Champ refused to use it. Willow Small Packaged Magnus to claim the win.

Your Winner: Willow
Impact Score: 2.0 out of a possible 5

Eric went to MVP’s office. Security tried to stop him but couldn’t. MVP wasn’t there so Eric just tore up the office and left. Break time

Dixie and Spud were outside the family home. There were several more tables set up. Bully Ray called to discuss his “Art Projects”. He told Dixie he was inside her house. She sent Spud and the camera crew into the house. Dixie called the cops.

Gail Kim came out to the ring. Gail is having issues with the Beautiful People, especially Angelina Love. Taz really pushed how great Gail Kim is. I can’t disagree. She is very likely the most talented female wrestler that is active in either TNA or WWE. Gail wasn’t there to play games. Gail wanted to prove that she was the hardest working Knockout on the roster. She explained that she helped build the Knockout division. She challenged either one of the Beautiful People…or both of them, for that matter.

Velvet Sky and Angelina Love strolled out from the back. Love mocked Gail for being jealous. She also insulted her look. Love said Gail shouldn’t be and wouldn’t be the champ. Love accepted the challenged and Velvet jumped Gail from behind. Love said Gail would fight Sky, right now.

Gail Kim vs Velvet Sky

Sky pounded Gail’s head into the canvas. Whip by Sky into a Corner Crossbody. Snap Mare after a second Corner Splash. Slider Dropkick by Sky for two. Hair Biel by Velvet. Gail with a Back Elbow but Sky kept fighting. Float Over by Gail. Dropkick by Gail. Whip by Gail into the Drive Thru Crossbody. Sky ran Gail into the rign post after Love distracted. With the ref distracted, Love attacked Gail. Love threw Gail back in the ring. Sky went to Makeover Gail. Running Yakuza Kick to Gail’s back. The ref removed the bag and Sky went into a Sleeper. Jawbreaker by Gail. Power Driver DDT by Velvet. 1-2-no! Sky took the mirror to be sure she still looked hot. Sky picked up Gail but Gail nailed the Eat Da Feet!

Your Winner: Gail Kim
Impact Score: 1.75

Angelina Love was shocked at her partner’s loss. Love slid in the ring and attacked Gail. THE BPs stood over the out cold Gail Kim.

Crazy Steve was ready to fight, next. I love The Menagerie. Of course, I liked the Oddities. Steve goes against Kazarian, next.

Tenay talked about the injury to Kurt Angle, last week. Taz chimed in that Kurt has a torn ACL. Ethan Carter III talked, last week, about what he did. Ethan took credit for tearing the ACL. Ethan felt Kurt Passed the Torch. Ethan said he was the Future because he destroyed the Past. Whatever.

Kazarian vs Crazy Steve (w/Menagerie)

Last week, Knux destroyed Kaz with the Carne Vale Powerbomb (Sky High Powerbomb). The circus music went off and Rebel, Knux, The Freak and the Stilt Walkers came out. Steve fell into the ring.

After all the fun inros, it was time for action. Tenay suggested that Steve was channeling the spirit of the great Harpo Marx by only using the horn to talk. Kaz jumped Steve and threw the balloons out of the ring. Kaz jumped out and got up in Freak’s face. School Boy Trip by Steve and Rob err Freak. Steve played on the apron. The circus music kept playing. Steve was flipped into the ring and then he Low Bridged Kaz out of the ring. Steve placed the balloons in the middle of the ring and hit a Top Rope Splash on them. This is just bizarre. Scott Wheeler, the ref, was losing control. Steve pulled down the ref’s pants and the ref disqualified Steve. Seriously?

Your Winner (by stupid disqualification): Kazarian
Impact Score: 1.0

Austin Aries got up in MVP’s face. Aries smacked the biggest security guard. MVP cracked Aries in the ribs and had his goons throw Aries off the property. Eric then jumped MVP and began to beat the daylights out of the Boss.

The fight spilled out into the main arena. MVP dropped Eric on the guard rail. MVP with straight punches. Eric came back to throw some bombs of his own. The ended up on the stage and Eric stomped away. MVP went Street on Eric with his punches. Eric gave as good as he got. Eric with a questionable kick. Eric slammed MVP into the ring apron. MVP attacked Eric’s tricep with a knee shot. MVP snapped Eric’s arm on the apron. The fight moved into the ring. Eric kicked and punched MVP, wildly. MVP reversed a Whip but ate both of Eric’s Boots. Spear! Security finally rushed out to break apart Eric and MVP. Taz felt Eric’s arm was seriously injured. “Let Them Fight!” rang out. Eric broke free and attacked MVP. They were pulled apart.

Spud was looking around the house in a wonderfully fun red, white and blue lightning jacket that I would SO wear. Spud heard Ray coming. The cameraman said “Dixie sent US”. Ray understood and went around to grab Spud. The whole suit was that wild Red, White and Blue pattern. Ray said to stay tuned…

Mr. Anderson vs “Cowboy” James Storm

Ken did his intro thing. Still one of the most fun intros in the business. TNA showed how Storm cost Ken a shot at the World Title, a couple weeks back. Storm then came out to his new intro. I like this darker version of Storm. He does heel so much better than face. Break before the action kicked in.

The bell rang and Storm pushed Ken. Ken with hard punches and Whips. La Bandera Clothesline by Ken. The fight kept going on the floor as Storm’s face was bounce doff the ring steps. Body Shots by Ken. Ken rammed Storm into the ring barrier and cracked the ribs. Storm snapped Ken’s arm on the top rope. Storm sent Ken into the ring post. Storm then slammed the hand into the ring steps.

Back in the ring, the two went wild and wooly. Storm escaped the Green Bay Plunge. Rolling Neckbreaker by Ken. Storm with an Elbow to a charging Ken. Ken finally got the Rolling Senton/Green Bay Plunge. He called for the Mic Check but Storm backed up. Reverse Low Blow Kick. Storm tried to pin Ken by using the ropes. He got caught. Storm with a wicked DDT but he couldn’t get the 3. Storm was frustrated and rolled out to the floor. He found a bottle of brew and chugged some of it. He brought the bottle into the ring. Storm spat beer in Ken’s eyes as Anderson went for the Mic Check. Last Call Superkick!

Your Winner: James Storm
Impact Score: 2.0

The Samuel Show match led to finding Shaw in the loony bin. Someone was there to see him. All he could do was ask for Christy. Who was there to see him?

A promo piece aired about Sanada. That led to…

Sanada vs Tigre Uno vs Zema Ion aka DJZ
Triple Threat Match for the X-Division Title

Zrma had taped up ribs thanks to last week’s Ladder Match. Sanada has one of the coolest ring robes.

DJZ talked to both men and then attacked. Zema now sports a rainbow Mohawk. Tigre and Sanada with the double team on DJZ and sent him to the outside. Enziguri by Tigre to Sanada. Whip by Sanada but he ate a boot. Hurancanrana by Sanada. Sanada missed the Moonsault but nailed the Dropkick. Sanada with a Pak Song Cradle Roll. 2 count. DJZ blocked the Tiger Suplex. Zema dropped down to stun Sanada in the corner. He choked the champ on the middle rope. Shotgun Knees onto Samda. Zema kept up the pressure with a Hammer Throw. 2 count. Zema threw Tigre into the ring post as the third man tried to get in the ring.

Sanada opened up on Zema with Open Hand Chops and Thrusts. DJZ tried to reverse things but Sanada blasted the former champ. Open Hand Slaps by both DJZ and Sanada. They were stopped by Tigre’s Missile Dropkick. Tigre with a Twisting Plancha to both opponents. Tigre went to the top but DJZ pushed him off and Tigre straddled the top rope. Sanada with a Springboard Chop into the Tiget Suplex (Double Underhook German).

Your Winner: Sanada
Impact Score: 3.25

Ray called Dixie to let her know that she was all alone, now.

By the way, this Tuesday is the finale of Season 4 of Ink Master. If you like body art, the top 3 are getting ready to duke it out for $ 100,000a feature in Inked Magazine and the title of Ink Master. I’m putting my money on Sausage (and not just because he’s a Nevada Man, like me).

It was back to the loony bin. Gunner was the mystery person there to visit Shaw. Gunner said he was there to help Shaw. Shaw was doing his best Norman Bates look.

Another video ran of how Kurt Angle tore his ACL, last week. Kurt said he heard the knee pop. The doc told Kurt that he would have to have surgery on the knee. Kurt did have ACL surgery. Kurt’s surgery went well but he’ll be out of action for some time.

Dixie was freaking out as she looked for Bully Ray. He wouldn’t respond to her. She found the injured Spud. Ray then shut the door. Ray asked Dixie if she ever thought it would come to this. Ray said Dixie caused all this. Ray said he was p*ssed because of what Dixie did at Sacrifice. Ray wondered if Dixie really thought he was afraid of her. Ray asked Dixie if she wanted to have this all go away and for him to leave him alone. Ray wanted Dixie to say “Dixie Carter Fears Bully Ray”. If she’d say that, he would leave. She stared to say it but Ray was jumped by Ethan Carter III. She told Ray that Dixie Carter fears…No One!

It was time for the Main Event.

Bobby Roode has been suspended, indefinitely, from TNA. That was because of his attack on MVP, last week.

Eric Young vs MVP
World Title Match

Eric broke tradition by coming out first. MVP then made his entrance. MVP was sporting his new t-shirt, which I’m sure is available at TNAWrestling.com.

Eric jumped MVP on the floor and went wild on the contender. He choked MVP with MVP’s own shirt. Whip by Eric was reversed. Eric’s hurt arm went into the ring steps. MVP stalked Eric and wedged the arm into the steps. He pushed the steps into the ring post and then kicked the steps. Taz was concerned about possible injury. The bell never sounded. MVP got in Brian Hebner’s face. MVP twisted Eric’s arm around the rig barrier and then kicked he barrier. TNA took a quick break.

The two men finally ended up in the ring so Brian Hebner could call for the bell. MVP stayed focused on the injured arm. Eric began to punch away with his one good arm. Kitchen Sink and Full Mount Punches by MVP. 2 count. MVP ran the shoulder into the turnbuckle. Taz and Tenay felt the title was about to change, especially after Eric was sent into the ring post. Arm Bar by MVP. Eric was obviously in agony. Eric kept fighting back. MVP dropped Eric and kicked away, in the corner. Weak Whip by MVP. MVP missed the Running Boot. Eric with hard punches. Discus Clothesline by Eric. Universal into the Flying Forearm by Eric. Eric called for the Savae Elbow! He was attacked by Kenny King. Huh? King nailed his finisher and told MVP to take the win. MVP ordered the ref to restart the match. Brian refused. MVP threatened to fire Brian Hebner. It was a 2-on-1 assault on the World Champ. This was ridiculous. They were stopped by the arrival of Bobby Lashley! He then Speared Eric! What the Hell? King threw chairs into the ring. Bobby with the Powerslam through the tables. MVP said there was one thing missing. He had King bring him the title. Is this the birth of the…Ebony Alliance?

Peace

–Jay Shannon
WordSlingerJay@Gmail.com
Twitter.com/jayshannonnv

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