Posted April 7th, 2017 by 1Wrestling News Team

Feeling the Impact
by Jay and Lottie Shannon

The ladies were in the spotlight as they worked a Gauntlet Battle Royal to figure out who would be next to face the Demon Assassin, Rosemery, for the Knockout Title.

Wanted to start by sending a special Happy Birthdays to two very dear people in our lives. Today (the 6th) is our good friend, Joe Guenther’s, birthday. Tomorrow, is Jay’s Aunt Wanda’s birthday. She was told around Thanksgiving she would never see 2017. She’s now 1/4th of the way through the year. Way to go and keep the fire alive. Smile.

Roll the opening montage.

E-Li Drake vs Caleb Conley


This match was already in process as Impact kicked off.

Caleb with a Leg Sweep and Backsplash Senton. E-Li came back with Corner Shoulders. Flying Neckbreaker by Drake. 2 count. Drake missed a Knee Drop. Caleb hit an Elbow and the two traded wild punches. Caleb nailed a Suicide Dive. Caleb hit a Top Rope Crossbody. Caleb followed that with a modified Uranage Slam. Drake caught Caleb on the
ropes. Superplex and then Drake finishd Caleb off. He did have a little help from Tyrus.

Your Winner: E-Li Drake
Impact Score: 2.0 out of a possible 5

JB and Josh bickered back and forth, as usual. Josh took the house microhpne and started talking about his wife. JB threatened to knock Josh’s *ss out. Bruce Prichard ran down and ordered both men to get in t.he ring, NOW!

Bruce was sick of this crap (so are we). Bruce told them both the Shut the Hell Up! Josh started to take his jacket off but Bruce told him to keep it on. Bruce ordered them to set up their own teams. Next week, Team Josh will face Team JB. Bruce screamed at them to shake hands.

We saw Davey Richards and Angelina Love-Richards show up.

Knockout Gauntlet Match

Ava Store vs Madison Rayne

Josh finally admitted that Madison was his wife. Madison mocked her opponent. Ava looked like she was about 12. Deep Arm Drag by Ava. Ava was trained by Jay Lethal.

Vs Rebel

Rebel tore into Ava as Josh whined that no one was reading the rules. Double Team on Ava. Madison and Rebel fought over who would eliminate Ava.

Vs Amanda Rodriguez

Amanda Shoulder Tackled everyone in sight. Curious if Amanda is related to Alberto El Patron. Amanda rammed Rebel into the corner. Rebel switched it up.

vs M.J. Jenkins

Springboard Dropkick to Amanda. Corner Shoulders by Rebel to Ava.

vs Diamonte

The Latina went to town on everyone in sight. She stomped away on Amanda. Hesitation Dropkick by Diamonte to Amanda. God, I wish Josh and JB would shut up. Amanda was eliminated.

vs ODB

ODB threw all the women into the same corner.
Massive Corner Splash. Ava was eliminated.

vs Brandi Rhodes

Brandi was the last opponent. Diamonte and M.J. were quickly eliminated. Madison dumped out Brandi. Madison got up in ODB’s face. ODB slapped Rayne’s chest. Maddie went to the eyes. Madison hurt her hand slapping ODB’s large chest. TKO by ODB. 1-2-3!

Your Winner: ODB
Impact Score: 2.5

James Storm arrived in the Zone. We saw Storm quit the DCC, 2 weeks back. He let everyone know that “The Cowboy” was back. Storm talked about his 5-year old son helping him to find his true self. Storm mentioned he brought in the biggest ratings in Impact history when he won the World title. Storm was ready to get back to kicking *ss.

Bram and Kingston showed up and read their former leader the riot act. Kingston freaked out about being lied to by Storm. He went too far by calling Storm’s kid a B*st*rd. Storm reminded Kingston that James brought in Eddie and even put together their music. Storm said Bram and Kingston went off course. Storm was called “a selfish little b*tch” by Kingston. Storm stood his ground and got spit in his face. Last Call Superkick to Kingston. Bram drew back a chair but didn’t use it. Superkick to Bram! Storm reintroduced himself and told them (chant along) “Sorry about your damn luck!”

Andrew Everett was interviewed. He was asked about having to continue to climb towards a title shot against Trevor Lee. Everett knew Gregory Shane Helms was causing this problem. Helms came in and said if Everett won the Triple Threat, he MIGHT be a step closer to an X-Division Title Match.

A video aired about the Helms Dynasty. Can you truly have a dynasty with only one member? OK, two if you count Helms.

Andrew Everett vs Marshe Rockett vs Suicide

I’ve been given an insight as to who is now playing Suicide but I’ll keep it to myself. I’ve only shared it with Lottie.


I had to mute the sound because I was sick of hearing Josh and JB b*tch at each other.

Flying Headscissors by Andrew to Suicide. Suicide nailed the Suicide Plunge onto Andrew and Marshe. Rockett nailed a Clothesline to Suicide. Rockett then got in the ring to attack Andrew. Scoop Slam by Rockett led to a Knee Drop. Shoulder by Andrew. Rockett hit a Powerslam on the flying Everett. Suicide fell to a Marshe Spinebuster. Low Bridge sent Rockett to the floor. Suicide Solution but Rockett made the save. Step Over Abdominal Stretch by Suicide. Gourdbuster by Rockett to Suicide. Everett hit a Pele to Suicide and then flew into a Reverse Shooting Star Press to take this one.

Your Winner: Andrew Everett
Impact Score: 3.5

It was time for the Hour Turner segment. This week, Impact placed Davey Richards agaisnt Eddie Edwards in a Last Man Standing Match.

Eddie Edwards vs Davey Richards
Last Man Standing Match


Eddie jumped Davey, on the ramp. Eddie pitched Davey into the ring. Davey rolled out the opposite side. Davey unloaded with harsh kicks to Eddie’s chest. Suicide Dive by Eddie. Eddie blistered Davey’s chest with Knife Edge Chops.

The two went out into the crowd. Davey found a garbage can. Davey yelled at a female fan. Eddie crotched Davey on a metal gate. Eddie blocked a Suplex. Eddie flew over the railing and landed on the big garbage can.

Angelina yelled for her hubby. Davey with vicious kicks to the chest. They finally got back in the ring. Davey’s chest was blood red from the chops. Davey brought a chair into the ring. He shoved it into Eddie’s throat. Love slid more chairs into the ring. Davey set them up and smooched his bride. Eddie Powerbombed Davey through a pair of chairs. The count started on Davey.

Eddie brougt in more chairs as the ref made it to 8. Eddie bashed his former partner, over and over. Eddie threw one chair into Davey’s face. Eddie went back under the ring to get…more chairs. He bent a chair over Davey’s back and then set up the group of chairs. Eddie climbed up the ropes. Love got involved and Davey threw a chair into Eddie’s face. They went up top and Davey hit multiple Headbutts. Eddie blocked the Superplex but only for a moment. They landed on the pile of chairs. Damn!

Both men were down and hurt. The ref began his count. Davey asked the ref to stop the count. Eddie’s wife showed up at ringside. Love wrapped a chain around her fist. She changed her mind and cthrew it intot he ring. Impact went to break? Now? Really?

Alisha Edwards screamed at Davey. Davey punched Eddie in the face with the chain. Alisha started the fans chanting for her hubby. Davey cracked Eddie with the chain-wrapped fist. Eddie came back with brutal punches. Davey choked Eddie with the chain. This was all legal.

Eddie seemed out. Davey knelt and smooched his wife. Davey yelled at the fans to shut up. Davey kicked Eddie’s chest, several times. Eddie caught Davey’s leg and then chopped away in rapid fire motion. Exploder Overhead into the corner by Eddie. Skateboard Chair Shot to Davey’s face. Eddie drove the chair into Davey’s face for a 2nd time. Sullivan Tree of Woe by Eddie. Eddie placed a whole lot of chairs against Davey’s face. Hesitation Dropkick! Love was losing her mind.

Davey crawled towards Eddie. Eddie wedged Davey’s neck in the chair. Eddie then went up top. He pointed at Love and then got ready to fly. Double Stomp! Davey’s Dead! Kept waiting for one of the announcers to say it. The girls got involved. Eddie refused to let the ref count. Eddie picked up the chair and got it batted into his own face. Love slid back in the ring. Davey wrapped the chain around his ankle and hit Creeping Death. It did take Love asking Davey to do it for her.

Your Winner: Davey Richards
Impact Score: 4.0

The Veterans of War are coming to Impact.

Jeremy Borash talked about being in support of Impact.

We saw LAX win the World Tag Team Titles. Who could stop them? Konnan is back at full tilt with this reborn version of the Latin American Exchange. Konnan called for a Televised Revolution.

Alberto El Patron was set to fight.

Impact ran a video of James Storm with some musicians to redo Storm’s theme music.

Alberto El Patron vs an unnamed opponent

Patron snapped his foe over and almost pinned him. Back Drop Suplex by Alberto. El Patron got planted with a Spinning Matanza Slam. Double Stomp by Alberto to finish this one.

Your Winner: Alberto El Patron
Impact Score: 1.25

Alberto called out Bobby Lashley. Alberto told Bobby to quit hiding from him.

Braxton Sutter and Allie were interviewed. Allie felt good about standing up to Sienna. Sienna and KM came in to fight. Karen Jarrett stepped between them to stop this insanity. There will be a mixed tag match, next week.

It was time for Josh and JB to pick their teams.Would this be Next Gen vs Originals?

Sienna has something wicked coming for Allie and Braxton, next week.

Bruce Prichard joined Josh and JB in the ring. It was time to pick teams. JB kissed up to Bruce and Josh called him on it. JB was heppy to help Josh look like a bigger jackass than ever. “Fire Josh” rang out from the crowd. Bruce said it would be a 4-on-4 team. Josh got to pick first:

Josh Mathews: Bobby Lashley
Jeremy Borash: Alberto El Patron
Josh Mathews: Bram
Jeremy Borash: Chris Adonis (Chris Masters)
Josh Mathews: E-Li Drake

Tyrus got in the ring and they all beat on JB’s Squad. I guess Tyrus is a part of Team Josh. JB called out his 3rd pick…MATT MORGAN! Sweet! Carbon Footprint and Spin Slam by Morgan.Matt squared off with Lashley. We didn’t get to see the 4th member. I went to Impact’s website to find out it was…MAGNUS!

Peace and Love

–Jay and Lottie Shannon

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