WHAT HAPPENED, THIS WEEK, @ IMPACT WRESTLING

Posted October 31st, 2016 by jshannon

The show opened with Matt Hardy celebrating All Hallows Eve. The enire Hrdy brood were at the compound for this big party. There was a huge Corn Field Maze. This was beyond weird. Matt had a premonition: A stranger will arrive with a looming message. Whatever. After making it through the maze, it was time for Treat or Delete.

In the arena..

Ethan Carter III and Jessie Godderz vs E-Li Drake and Aron Rex

The Finish:

The pendulum swung back and forth for both teams. Drake hit a passing Clothesline and tried for a better one. Both men hit Clotheslines. Tags on both sides. EC3 yook yhr fight to both foes. Drake distracted Ethan and that let Rex hit hard knees. Drake tagged back in and threw shoulders in the corner. Drake punched away until Ethan punched back. Scoop Slam by Drake, followed by an Elbow Drop to Ethan’s chest.

Tag back to Rex. Aron hit a Side Russian Leg Sweep. Elbow of Distinction by Rex (formerly the Elbow of Disdain). Tag to Drake. Drake slowed things down with a Rear Chin Lock. EC3 battled free and sent Drake to the corner. Drake slid out and hit a Flying Neckbreaker. The heel duo tagged in and out to keep Ethan off his game. Ethan caught Drake with a Sleeper. Drake reversed it into his own Sleeper. Jawreaker provided teh escape. Tag to Jessie.

Godderz hit a Scoop Powerslam and Side German Throw. This kid is pretty darn impressive. Jessie reversed a Whip but Rex came in and distracted Jessie. Godderz came right back and Dropkicked Drake. Drake was not the legal man. Ethan attacked Drake. The ref tried to break them apart. Jessie hit a Springboard Forearm. Rex, the legal man, went to Jessie’s eyes. Rex had something in his hand and he knocked out Jessie.

Your Winners: Aron Rex dn E-Li Drake
Impact Scorecard: 2.75 out of a possible 5

TNA looked at the end of last week’s World Title Match. Maria attacked Brandi Rhodes, at ringside. Maria crowed about how great she was and how she destroyed Rhodes. Brandi came in to kick her butt but Maria took off. There will be a mixed tag match as our main event.

Grado was interviewed. Grado was happy about Halloween. Grado was planning to dress up as one of his favorites. JB started to chuckle as he found out who Grado was going to impersonate. That silliness would happen, right after a few words from our sponsors.

The Halloween Party was started at the House of Hardy. Kids were given veggies instead of candy. That sucked. It was a cute segment, to be honest. Not as much fun as the Zombie Crawl but this ws more for kids.

Rock Star Spud said he was tired of being over-looked. Spud now has two allies in the X-Division and they would make life Hell for the other X-ers.

Grado waddled out to the stage. He talked about having the time of his life in the company and wanting more. Grado said he wanted to bring out a Legend and future Hall of Famer…Robbie E! Seriously? Robbie is a great wrestler but not sure if he will make it to Hall of Fame. Robbie looked confused as he came from the back. Grado talked about being who you want to be on Halloween. Grado wanted to be a BroMan. Grado ran tothe back to change. Robbie said it takes years to be a BroMan. They killed time as Grado changed his outfit.

Grado came out in bright yellow undies. Ewwww! Grado danced and Lottie just about lost her lunch. Grado did the Butt Bu mp and sent Robbie tumbling. Robbie didn’t want any part of this silliness but finally played along. Grado freaked out Pope as he gyrated near D’Angelo Dinero. Grin. They made their way up to the ring.

The silliness came to a sudden halt as Khaos attacked. I still say it’s The Addiction and another buddy doing the KRD thing. aybe it is Rock Star Spud nad his two allies? Grado was taken out with a Spike Piledriver. Robbie was also demolished.

Allie talked with Billy Corgan. Allie was all star-struck. Billy explained that he now makes the matches. Allie wanted to fight Maria, even though she knew Maria was a tough fighter. He wished her good luck. She is just way too cute.

DJZ, Mandrews and Braxton Sutter (Go For Broke) vs Rock Star Spud, Crazzy Seve and Abyss

No Rosemary? Damn.

The Finish:

Mandrews dove for his corner but Steve blocked him. Mandrews threw wild Forearms and a hard kick. Body Scissors Roling Stomp. Tag to DJZ. Zema hit a wild Jawbreaker nad Springboard Back Eblow. He also did a Poetry in Motion-like Dropkick. Tag to Spud. Spuud got blsted by Mandrews adn then fell to the ZDT!

Your Winners: DJZ, Braxton Sutter and Mandrews
Impact Scorecrad: 3.0

Cody and Brandi Rhodes discussed at what happened, lasst week. Cody was ready to kick butt and dissolve the Smoke nad Mirrors. Brandi just wanted to make that “b*tch” tap out.

J.B. was in the ring for the Contract Signing for next week’s World title match. Bobby Lashley came out first. He looked so confident as he entered the ring. Eddie Edwards was the next to arrive. The Lone Wolf got one Hell of a Pop from the crowd. Eddie placed the World title belt on the table.

JB talked about the pending title match. Bobby and Eddie are not allowed any physical contact before the match. JB gave them both the opportunity to speak. Lashley went first. Bobby felt the “No Touch” cluase was laughable. Bobby was certain what would happen, next week. Eddie will get beaten up. Bobby felt he had to jump through hoops just to get to Eddie. Bobby knew the fans waned Eddie to win but that really didn’t matter. Bobby promised to end the “Feel Good” Story next week. Bobby said someone like him deserved to be champion. Bobby crowed abouthis dominance in combat sports. Bobby felt Eddie’s reign was nothing but a joke. Bobby suggested that Eddie should be smart and forfeit the title.

Eddie immediately answered back to counter the mind games. Eddie knew he got his *ss whipped, in the past. Eddie was proud of his standing as World Champion. Eddie knew Bobby thought he was an easy opponenta nd it bit him in the behind. Eddie hoped that Bobby was underestimate him, agiain. Bobby admitted that Eddie was right. Bobby felt Eddie got lucky and his luck was about to run out. Bobby told Eddie that Edwards was about to pay. Eddie countered that he was not a One Hit Wonder, he was there to stay. Eddie signed on the dotted line. JB then took the paper and offered it to Lshley. Bobby quickly went to sign but Eddie stopped him. Eddie wondered how Bobby would react if he were to lose, next week. They almost went to blows as he struck a nerve with Bobby. JB kept them from tearing each other apart and then announced the Super Fight…for next week. Lashley warned Eddie that Edwards had just signed his fate.

TNA looked at how Allie stood up to Maria, last week. She showed some backbone to tell Maria that she was not at fault for Maria’s loss. Laurel Van Hess attacked llie. Maria put Allie in a mattch against Laurel. Laurel walked towards the ring and stopped to flirt.

We went back to Casa De Hardy for more Treat or Deleters. Gregory Helms showed up in his Hurricane costume. Too funny. Brother Nero went to change his costume. Someone was at the door. Not sure who it was but he was goofy. Whatever.

Jeff’s goofy character was tearing up the yard with a weed whacker. He was making all kinds of designs in the yard.

Back to action…

Laurel Van Ness vs Allie

The Finish:

Damn, Allie is cute. I know I’m about to get smacked but she is just adorable. Madison Rayne was at ringside for this one.

Laurel just dominatd the rookie. Allie did get one god slap in, before being sent to the floor. Laurel slammed Allie’s face intothe ring apron. Laurel wasted a lot of time and Allie moved when Laurel charged. Allie pitched Laurel back in the ring. Allie hit a Double Leg and pounded away. The fans were loving it. School Girl and Allie almost got the win. Laurel hit a Standing Stomp to get the three.

Your Winner: Laurel Van Ness
Impct Scorecard: 1.0

We returned to the party. They made fun of Donald Trump and his “wall”. They also got shots in at Hillary. This was beyond silly. “Broken” Matt Hardy wanted to be considered for President. Hmmmm….I could see him running things…a lot better than the other two.

Jessie got up in Aron Rex’s face. Jessie was ticked off at how Aron cheated to beat him. Jessie demanded another title shot. Aron accepted it and told Jessie to get ready. Rex showe doff the ring he used to knock out Jessie, earlier.

Someone showed up with something for Matt to watch. Matt called over everyone to watch the messsge. It was from Khaos. The masked group was ready to take eveything from the Hardys. Weird. They are now officially known as the ECC. I prefer Khaos.

Maria and MIke Bennett cut a promo about he main event match. Mike bragged about all he has done.

Mike and Maria Bennett vs Cody and Brandi Rhodes
Mixed Tag Team Match

The Finish:

Maria pulled Brandi off the apron to prevent a tag. Mike sent Cody to the corner nad hit a Clorner Clothesline. Mike held Cody and Maria went for a Low BLow Kick. She hit Mike, instead. Tag to Brandi. Brandi tore into Maria with wild punches. They rolled around and ran outside the ring. They aren’t Charlotte and Sasha, that’s for sure. Brandi hit a series of wild Clotheslines. Brandi used a Drop Toe HOld to send Maria into Mike’s nethers. Brandi hit a Reverse Russian Leg Sweep. American Nightmare by Cody to Mike. Brandi did something similar to Maria. Mike tapped out for his family!

Your Winner (by Submission): Cody and Brandi Rhodes
Impact Scorecard: 2.0

Backstage, Lashley attacked Cody. Brandi screamed for help. Bobby told Cody “No one comes into MY house without permission”

Peace and Love

–Jay Shannon and Lottie Smith
WordSlingerJay@Gmail.com

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