CRYSTAL BALL — PAYBACK 2014

Posted May 31st, 2014 by jshannon

Crystal Ball — Payback 2014

Jay Shannon draws upon all his predictive powers to try and figure out the winners and losers of a major wrestling event.

The WWE is back with yet another Pay-per-view. This is all about revenge, not that most wrestling events aren’t filled with revenge-oriented storylines. Let’s take a look at the matches and try and figure this one out…

Hornswoggle vs El Torito
Hair vs Mask Match
Pre-Show Kick Off

Predictions:

So, Hornswoggle ripped the tail off the “Little Bull” to take this meaningless feud to another level of boring. For this PPV, Horny is putting up his semi-greasy hair vs El Torito risking his Bull Mask. It really makes no sense to have El Torito lose this one. Taking away the mask would effectively kill the character. Hornswoggle (who seriously needs an updated identity) will drop the locks after a rather dull match.

Predicted Winner: El Torito
Predicted Grade: 1.0 (at best)

Rusev (wLana) vs Big E

Predictions:

This will definitely not be a Squash Match. To quote the late, great Gorilla “The Irresistible Force meets the Immovable Object”. Big E is coming off a decent push, while Rusev is a rising star. It will help push Rusev to the next level to defeat the former Intercontinental Champion. It’s all about momentum and Rusev has it. Rusev forces Big E to tap out to the Accolade to shock the crowd.

Predicted Winner (by Submission): Rusev
Predicted Grade: 2.0

Paige vs Alicia Fox
Divas Title Match

Predictions:

Fox has been acting bizarre, as of late. She has won a few matches and lost a few. Heaven Help anyone near her when she loses. On Sunday, the announcers and the ringside fans are likely to get a temper tantrum that will register a 10.0 on the Richter Scale when Fox taps out to the P.T.O..

Predicted Winner *by Submission): Paige
Predicted Grade: .5

Bad News Barrett vs Rob Van Dam
Intercontinental Title Match

Predictions:

I’m a huge fan of RVD. That makes this prediction rather tough for me. Barrett is on the crest of a wave, right now. RVD is, at best, nearing the end of his active career (at least in one of the bigger organizations). RVD will rock the Hell out of Barrett for awhile but will get taken out with the Bull Hammer Elbow.

Predicted Winner: Bad News Barrett
Predicted Grade: 2.5

Sheamus vs Cesaro
United States Title Match

Predictions:

I’m really torn on this one. It would be a good move to have Sheamus drop the strap and then switch his focus to Bad News Barrett. That would help move Cesaro a bit higher up the ladder from where he is, right now. I wouldn’t be shocked to see Cesaro take the strap but I think I’m going to go with Sheamus to retain.

Predicted Winner: Sheamus
Predicted Grade: 3.0

John Cena vs Bray Wyatt
Last Man Standing Match

Predictions:

This feud is one of the better ones in recent WWE history. While I’m not happy with the pseudo-religious turn of Bray Wyatt, this feud is keeping everyone’s attention. It’s time for Cena to pull a rabbit out of the hat and win this one. I wouldn’t be surprised to see the return of the Duct Tape o’ Doom that John used to defeat Batista, a few years back.

Predicted Winner: John Cena
Predicted Grade: 4.25

The Shield (Dean Ambrose, Seth Rollins and Roman Reigns) vs Evolution (Triple H, Randy Orton, Batista)

Six Man No Holds Barred, Elimination Match

Predictions:

If I were booking this, I know exactly how it should go down. Dean Ambrose gets eliminated and then Seth Rollins goes out. That leaves Roman Reigns to face all three members of Evolution. Reigns would come back to overcome the ultimate odds to win this one. It just might happen that way but if Creative has any plans for continuing this hot feud, Evolution needs to come out on top. Roman is going to be the highlight star of this match. I still think my scenario of Roman vs Evolution is the best direction that Creative could take this one. Roman could take out Randy and maybe even Batista. Then HHH does something evil, like break out the Sledge Hammer, to show The Shield just how low Evolution will go to dominate.

Predicted Winner: Triple H of Evolution
Predicted Grade: 4.25

Daniel Bryan’s Decision:

This one is just bizarre. If Daniel doesn’t drop the strap, Brie Bella (his wife) gets fired. I have a feeling that Daniel is going to be ready to give up the title but Brie takes the bullet just to prove a point. Wouldn’t it be a wild twist if Brie came out and said it would be okay to be fired, since she was going to quit, anyway, because…she is pregnant. I haven’t heard anything about her being in a “Family Way” but I just thought it would make the most fun of twists in this wild storyline.

Peace

–Jay Shannon
WordSlingerJay@Gmail.com
twitter.com/jayshannonnv

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