WHAT HAPPENED, THIS WEEK, @ (TNA) IMPACT WRESTLING

Posted May 11th, 2014 by jshannon

The main event of Slammiversary was revealed, and it was a serious shocker. Plus, Bully Ray took a trip to corporate headquarters.

Bully Ray was jamming out to some seriously annoying music. He turned it down and explained to the Mystery Cameraman that they were at the TNA offices. Ray was on the hunt for Dixie Carter. Ray was determined to put Dixie through a table.

A highlight reel of Eric Young’s title reign aired. He has beaten Magnus, twice, Abyss and Bobby Roode. MVP talked about how Eric Young helped MVP get his start, so many years ago.

Live in the Impact Zone and Taz and Tenay ran down the night’s card. E

Eric Young came out to talk to the fans. He was interrupted by the arrival of Bobby Roode. Roode demanded a fair shot at the title. Last week, Roode had to go through Gunner prior to facing Eric Young. Bobby said if he couldn’t beat Eric, he would never ask for another title shot. Eric admired Bobby’s desire and okayed the match, later in the night. Cool.

Impact showed how Angelina Love won the Knockout title. Last week, the BPs were stripped down to their undies. Up next, an Evening Gown Elimination Match. Suddenly, my office is filled with three teen grandsons. Grin.

MVP pulled Eric into his office. Eric wondered if there was a problem. MVP said while he appreciated Eric’s enthusiasm, he couldn’t allow him to make his own matches. MVP then called off the title match between Eric and Bobby Roode. Boo! Hiss! Eric was very disappointed by the decision. MVP got a little angry when Eric continued to push for a match. He guaranteed Eric that he would find Eric someone to defend he title against that Eric had NEVER faced before. Interesting.

Angelina Love and Velvet Sky vs Brittany and Madison Rayne
Evening Gown Elimination Tag Match

Ok, who gives a darn if they can wrestle. It’s 4 hot chicks getting stripped down to their skivvies. Yummy!

Velvet and Love got dropped by Drop Toe Holds. The Beautiful People almost got stripped in the opening minute. The BPs strolled over to their corner and the match continued. Love hooked up and took Brittney to the corner. Double team on the rookie sensation. Tag to Velvet. Shoulder Thrusts. It has to be a bear to wrestling in those gowns. Snap Mare nad Dropkick by Velvet. Brittany got the elbow up and hit a Big Boot. Clotheslines by Brrittney into a Side Russian Leg Sweep. Backspring Moonsault by Brittney. Love tripped Brittney and stripped her out of her white gown.

Brittney – Eliminated.

That elimination sent it to commercial. When TNA returned, Madison found herself in a bad way. She wasn’t going down without a fight. She threw Love out and then took the fight to Sky. Sky came back and ran Madison into the corner. Corner Choke with her bare foot. Love took the tag and ran Madison form pillar to post. Sky tagged back in and stomped away. She drove Madison’s neck into the middle rope.

Madison came back and Low Bridged Love out to the ring. Spear! Madison stripped down Sky and almost took her bra in the process!. Wow!

Velvet Sky – Eliminated

Love jumped Madison. Love got seriously vicious with her shots. Love choked Madison with Sky’s dress. Madison fought off Love’s attempt to remove her clothes. Rayne of Terror by Madison. Rayne got the discarded dress and choked Love. She also used it to Biel Love across the ring, twice. Love blocked the Spear. Velvet Sky strolled out as Madison hit the Spear. Velvet Opened her towel to flash the ref. Love used the distraction to spray Madison in the eyes with hair spray. Love then stripped the clothes off Madison.

Madison Rayne – Eliminated

Your Winner: Angelina Love
Impact Score: 2.25 (extra points for…well, do I really have to explain? Grin)

RockStar Spud wondered why Dixie Carter was leaving. Dixie told Spud to keep Bully out of the building, keep him from talking to anyone and never to let Ray know where she had gone.

A promo for Ethan Carter III aired. He will finally face Kurt Angle…next.

Magnus talked with his old buddy backstage. It was finally revealed that his name is Bram (I thought they said Graham, so I checked TNA’s website). Bram got himself a solid contract and then booked Magnus to face Willow. Magnus seemed confused. Bram tried to calm him down by explaining that he would be in Magnus’ corner.

Ethan Carter III vs Kurt Angle

The bell sounded and Kurt was ready for war. Collar and Elbow into a Go Behind and amateur Takedown. Kurt worked over the arm but the move got reversed and reversed back. Ethan with a kick and hard punches. Ethan focused on Kurt’s neck. Kurt came back with a Big Boot and punches and kicks. Snap Suplex by Kurt. 2 count. Ethan went for a Clothesline but ended up on the wrong end of the Hat Trick Germans. Kurt’s knee seemed to buckle after the move set.

Ethan noticed the limp and went right after the leg. The ref checked on it. Kurt kicked free and hit a pair of Clothesline. Angle Slam but Kurt went down and clutched his knee in pain. The ref wanted to call the match but Kurt wouldn’t have it. EC3 Speared the knee and took the quick cover.

Your Winner: Ethan Carter III
Impact Score:2.0

Ethan bailed out and left Kurt alone. Obviously, Kurt was severely hurt. That didn’t seem like an act. Kurt may well have destroyed the knee/ACL/MCL or something in that area. I know how the leg can buckle when injured. I tore my ACL about 15 years ago and my leg sometimes just “went”.

After the break, Kurt was being helped in the back. Kurt said he blew out the knee. He heard it pop. Kurt was so upset at the obvious injury.

MVP came out for his blockbuster announcement. He was cut off by Bobby Roode’s arrival. Bobby was seriously hot about getting shelved. Bobby told MVP to shut up. He explained that he and Eric shook on the deal to do the World title match. MVP said Bobby had his shot, last week. MVP said Bobby had to work his way back and “earn” his next title shot. Bobby ran down his resume for the Director of Wrestling Operations. Bobby told MVP that Bobby was there, MVP wasn’t. Bobby called MVP an SOB and MVP closed the conversation. He started to leave but Bobby grabbed him. Bobby then pushed MVP. Double Leg by MVP into a series of punches. The refs rushed out to break things up. Al Snow, Pat Kenney and others jumped in, as well. The fans screamed to “Let them Fight!”.

Back in Nashville, Bully Ray sneaked into the corporate offices. The receptionist was stressed out to see him. Ray was super nice to the girl and then went to look for Dixie. Spud tried to stop him but Ray just lifted the diminutive Brit up and carried him up the stairs. Ray told Spud to be quiet and to “Stay”. Spud ordered Ray to remove his shoes before entering Dixie’s office. Ray told Spud to go get him some tea. Spud left and Ray asked Katherine (the receptionist) to get everyone together for a big meeting.

The Menagerie was ready to debut. Knux and Rebel waited for a box to be delivered. Rebel was doing a fire swing thing.

Bobby Roode was ushered off the property. They wouldn’t even let him get his bags. This was just ridiculous.

Jessie Godderz and Robbie E (The BroMans) vs Davey Richards and Eddie Edwards (The Wolves)
World Tag Team Title Match, Double Ladder Match Rules

The Wolves chased off DJZ (Zema Ion). The BroMans jumped the Wolves and then drove a ladder into both Eddie and Davey. They ttook a ladder to the ring as The Wolves started towards the rign. The Wolves stopped the BroMans from going up the ladder. The BroMans then snapped both members of the Wolves’ necks on the top rope. Robbie and Jessie cracked the champs with a ladder. Eddie was left alone as Davey was sent to the floor. DJZ ran back out to the ringside area. Eddie was Sandwiched in a ladder. The BroMans set up a couple of ladders before going after Davey. Eddie helped Davey escape the Double Suplex. The Wolves started after the straps but the BroMans weren’t just that out of it. A second ladder was put in place. All four men fought on the ladders. Davey hit a series of Headbutts. The last one was so hard that it took both Davey and Jessie to the canvas. Jessie Dropkicked Eddie off the ladder. Eddie escaped a Press Slam and Suplexed both himself and Jessie to the outside. That was just bowling shoe ugly.

Davey with a Jumping Enziguri to Robbie. Robbie ended up on a propped up ladder. Davey climbed to the Ropes and howled. Double Stomp. Damn! Davey tried his best to crawl back into the ring. Davey nad Eddie both climbed the ladders. DJZ rushed in to top them. Bad move, Skippy. Double Headbutts and they then Supexed DJZ off the top of the Ladders! He flew into the ropes and then tumbled onto Robbie and Jessie. The Wolves took down the straps to retain.

Your Winners: The Wolves (Davey and Eddie)
Impact Score: 4.0 (would have been higher if the match hadn’t been so relatively short)

In the back, Knux was ready to unleash “The Freak” and “Crazy Steve”. The Freak is a masked man but anyone who has watched TNA over the past few years will IMMEDIATELY recognize who the muscled behemoth is (a certain British-born powerhouse that used to hang with Robbie E, Scott Steiner and the British Invasion).

Back at the offices, Spud couldn’t find Bully Ray. He called he receptionist and found out that Ray had called a meeting.

Kazarian vs Knux (w/Menagerie)

Crazy Steve is kind of a bizarre clown, along the line of ICP. The group came out to circus music. Damn, Rebel is mega-hot. There were stilt walkers up on the ramp, as well. This is just fun. Rebel straddled the ropes, sideways. This little group should do well.

Kaz jumped Knux but he former Aces and Eights member just threw Kaz across the ring. Kaz with a Missile Dropkick and Kip Up. Kaz choked Knux on the middle rope. Steve and Freak distracted Kaz. Knux with a huge Clothesline, Big Boot and Back Body Drop. Kaz came back with a Big Boot of his own. Flying Crossbody by Knux. Knux waited and went for the Back Body Drop. Instead, he finished off Kaz with the High Wire Powerbomb

Your Winner: Knux
Impact Score: 2.25

Spud went into the meeting room and found all the good little employees at their laptops. Spud started talking trash until he realized that Bully Ray was behind him. Ray set Spud to get a couple cases of beers. He asked the employees about the “Bully Fears Dixie” corporate motto. The people were all wearing shirts that said it. Ray said he knew how to fix this. Commercial Break Time.

TNA showed the birth of the James Storm vs Mr. Anderson feud. Next week, they will square off.

In the back, Gunner and Anderson talked about how Storm cost Anderson the match, last week. They also talked about Samuel Shaw. Ken had to go. Gunner told Ken to watch himself.

The party was going wild and wooly at headquarters. Spud lost his cool and went off on everyone in sight. Ray called Spud a “Buzzkill”. Ray said he had been talking important stuff. Ray said he would leave if Spud told him where Dixie was. Spud swore he didn’t know where Madame Dixie was. Ray had Spud drink some beer with him. Ray then picked up Spud and put him through a table! He took Spud’s phone and found out where Dixie lived. He was off to see the Wizard.

Willow cut one of his weird-as-Hell promo. It was about how Jeff Hardy lost to Magnus, thanks to all the other people. I so hate this stupid character.

Magnus (w/Bram) vs Willow

Bram has an iron-clad contract, now. The Psycho Warrior came out to his off-beat cackle and his Rob Zombie-like music. I shouldn’t say that…I LIKE rob Zombie. Willow got hit with a Clothesline, on the floor. Bram appreciated it. Magnus pitched Willow into the ring. Magnus stomped away. Whip by Magnus but Willow with the kick. Clothesline by Magnus. Stomps by the Brit. Rear Chin Lock by Magnus but Willow escaped. Float Over Hurancanrana by Willow. Wild punches by Willow. Flying Forearm and Inverted Atomic Drop by Willow. Double Leg Drop and Dropkick by Willow. Spinning Mule Kick by Willow. Backspring Forearm by Willow. Magnus rolled out of the ring. Slide Through Dropkick and Slide Through Splash by Willow. Bram jumped in the ring nad attacked Willow. Interesting Suplex by Bram. Bram then hit his finisher…Velvet Noise. He then handcuffed Willow to the bottom rope.

Your Winner (by Disqualification): Willow
Impact Score: 1.25

Bram got the spare turnbuckle, from under the ring, and cracked Willow in the ribs. The screams were pathetic and creepy. Magnus left the ring and Bram followed.

MVP told Eric to come with him to the ring to learn who he would face at Slammicersary.

After the break, MVP brought out Eric Young. He said the person was ready to be revealed. No music or video ran. MVP wondered if the guy was late. It was a ll a ruse. MVP suddenly attacked Eric, showing that HE would be the one to battle Eric at Slammiverary. Really? That’s the best they could come up with? I’m sure I’ll get plenty of feedback on this one.

Well, my friends, I have some fantastic news to share. Actually on several fronts. First of all, this will be one of my last recaps from this office. On Friday afternoon, I invested in a brand new travel trailer that I will be converting into my own private office. I’ll also be doing most of the writing form my brand new laptop. It’s been a great week. Between all this and putting the finishing touches on the film that I’ve thrown myself into for the last couple of years, it’s been a good week. If you go to www.indiegogo.com/projects/350-days, you can see a few trailers and learn a lot more about this labor of love.

Peace

–Jay Shannon
WordSlingerJay@Gmail.com
Twitter/com/jayshannonnv

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