WHAT HAPPENED, THIS WEEK, @ (TNA) IMPACT WRESTLING

Posted January 31st, 2014 by jshannon

The new mystery “Investor” was about to be revealed. One would expect the person to be a VIP…well, close. Welcome to Glasgow, Scotland.

The show began with a look at the Reign of Magnus. Dixie is upset that she has a new partner who will change TNA, forever.

Mike Tenay then discussed the exit of Sting from TNA. Sting faced a “Stacked Deck” against Magnus. Sting would have become the World Champ, had he won. As it was, he lost and his contract was shredded.

There was a huge battle, in the back. Samoa Joe and Kurt Angle wanted to destroy Ethan Carter III and Magnus. EC3, Magnus and RockStar Spud came out to the ring, after security calmed things down. The Scots seriously went off on Magnus (an Englishman). The fans were so loud that Magnus couldn’t be heard. Magnus just decided to move forward, despite the noise. Magnus said “The Boys in the Back” had a problem with Sting being run out of the company. Magnus took credit for running Sting, Jeff Hardy and A.J. Styles out of the company. Magnus said TNA was re-structuring and getting rid of the “Dead Weight”. Magnus said it was time for “Thinning of the Herd”. Magnus said he and Dixie Carter had plans to eliminate the dinosaurs and put the bulls out to pasture. Magnus said it was time for the new stars to shine. Magnus claimed to single-handedly eliminate Hardy, Styles and Sting. Ethan Carter III took exception to the claim that Magnus got rid of the people, by himself. Ethan started to talk about all the help that Magnus got but…

Enter Kurt Angle and Samoa Joe. Joe and Kurt cleared the ring and asked for the stick. Kurt said he and Joe made the trip across the pond to avenge the “Screwing of the Herd”. Kurt was upset that Magnus screwed over Sting to get rid of him. Kurt called Magnus a “Paper Champion”. Magnus warned Kurt not to say something he would regret. Kurt said the only thing he regretted was letting Magnus join their “Family”. Magnus said he was already a somebody before the Mafia and now he was even more of a somebody. Magnus suggested that Joe and Kurt were jealous. Joe said they were there to kick Magnus’ *ss. Magnus suggested a tag match: Magnus and EC3 vs Kurt and Joe. Magnus had a special stipulation. Magnus said if either Joe or Kurt were to lose, BOTH Kurt and Joe would be gone…for good. Joe and Kurt discussed it and then made a counter offer. Joe then suggested that if Joe or Kurt were to win, that person would instantly become the number one contender to the World Champion. Joe also called Magnus a “Paper Champion”. That pushed his button and Magnus accepted. Spud and Ethan tried to talk Magnus out of the match.

Dixie Carter then came out and said she would not allow the match to happen. Magnus took offense to Dixie telling him what he could and couldn’t do. Dixie said she didn’t need to be worrying about this. She was focused on the new Investor. She also didn’t’ want to risk Magnus losing the title to either Kurt or Joe. Magnus listened to the wild crowd chants of “Paper Champion” and then confirmed the tag match.

Outside, a black car pulled up. The Investor was inside. We’d find out who was inside the car, soon.

The Wolves (Eddie Edwards and Davey Richards) came out of the fancy car. They would not allow the camera crew to see who “The Investor was. The Wolves said all would be revealed, later.

Madison Rayne and Velvet Sky (The Beautiful People) vs Gail Kim and Lei’d Tapa

Gail jumped Madison, before the bell. Jeremy Borash was sitting in for Taz, this week. Tapa choked Madison as the ref was distracted. Gail threw Madison around the ring. Flying Clothesline by Gail. 2 count. Gail missed the Drive By and got Clotheslined. Velvet with a tag and a series of Clotheslines. Kicks by Sky into a Slider Clothesline. Bulldog Faceplant by Sky. Tapa with a cheap shot. Madison with a Spear to Gail. Dropkick to Tapa’s knees. Sky with her In Yo Face finisher.

Your Winners: The Beautiful People
Impact Score: 2.0 out of a possible 5

After the match, Chris Sabin came out to give Velvet a hard time. He berated her for costing him his X-Division title. He also called Madison Rayne a “Tramp”. Chris was being seriously childish in talking about how Velvet has been ignoring him. He brought up her “Time of the Month” (classy fella, that Sabin). Sabin said if Velvet would apologize and give him a massage, things could go back to how they were supposed to be. Sky thought about it and then explained she had one thing to tell him “We’re done!”. Chris had a major fit in the ring as Velvet walked away. Chris screamed that he decided when things were done, not her.

Kurt and Joe were talking. They went into a room to confront “Just the man we were wanting to see”.

After the break, we learned that the person that Kurt and Joe were looking for was Bobby Roode. Kurt and Joe took turns beating on Roode. Bobby got up in Kurt’s face and Joe’s. Joe grabbed Bobby by the throat. Joe was crushing Bobby’s windpipe but stopped short. He warned Bobby that if Bobby got involved, tonight, Joe would “End him”. Bobby choked and gasped but grinned, big time, after Joe and Kurt left.

James Storm came out to talk to the Scots. Storm did the Foley Pop for Glasgow. Storm had something to say to Gunner. He asked his friend to come to the ring. Storm explained that he had been friends with Gunner, for some time before Gunner came to TNA. Storm said it was time to “Put an End to This”. Gunner came out and explained they both had the goal of doing great things and being remembered. Gunner said the briefcase caused things to blow up between them. Gunner said he had to make a career decision. Gunner talked about his and Storm’s families. Gunner said Storm would have done the same thing that Gunner did, for his kids. Gunner asked Storm to hear him out. Gunner talked about his time in the military. Gunner said the Marine Corps made him a man and he fought for his brothers beside him. That got a “U.S.A.” chant going, which seemed odd. Gunner said he and Storm left it all in the ring, fighting beside his brother. Storm then said he knew what a great warrior Gunner has been. Storm said Gunner should start taking credit as one Hell of a wrestler. Storm said the only thing more important to him than wrestling was his kids. Storm’s kids asked him why he was mad at Gunner. That caused a light to come on. Storm said he was proud of Gunner and would always have Gunner’s back. Storm apologized for his behavior and shook Gunner’s hand. So much for their feud…

Bad Influence came out to taunt Gunner and Storm. Kaz called Storm a “Monkey Fart”. Interesting. Kaz talked about all the stuff that Storm wants. Kaz knew Storm wanted the World Title. Daniels then said he wanted to see the GunSlingers face Bat Influence. If Daniels or Kaz wins, they get the Briefcase. Storm and Gunner started beating on Bad Influence, as an answer to their challenge.

Christopher Daniels and Kazarian vs James Storm and Gunner
Briefcase-on-the-Line Match

Storm took Kaz to the corner and clocked him. Tag to Gunner. Gunner blasted Kaz and took him to the corner. Kaz reversed a Whip. Daniels with the Distraction, which allowed Kaz to hit an Enziguri. Tag to Daniels. Double Team beat down on Gunner. Storm stopped the pinfall. Gunner began to fight back on Kaz, who had tagged in. Back Elbow by Gunner. Daniels switched out and beat on Gunner. Small Package by Gunner but the ref was distracted.

Daniels wanted the Angel’s Wings but Gunner turned it into a Back Body Drop. Tag to Storm. Flying Forearm into the Inverted Atomic Drop, by Storm. Daniels sent Storm over the ropes. Storm with the Enziguri. Storm with a Crossbody off the top. Kaz went for the Elbow Drop but hit Daniels. Blind Tag by Kaz. Missile Dropkick. That sent Storm into the corner and Gunner took the tag. High Knee and a flurry of offense. Blanchard Slingshot Suplex!. Daniels got on the apron and ate the Last Call Superkick by Storm. Benoit Diving Headbutt by Gunner.

Your Winners: “Cowboy” James Storm and Gunner
Impact Score: 3.0

Dixie Carter was complaining, backstage, about he limo and who was inside. Spud tried to calm her down but it didn’t work. Dixie sent Spud to find out who was in the limo.

A profile of Samoa Joe aired. It was nice to see the old Six-Sided Ring, again. Bring it back.

Dixie was on the phone with her lawyer. She wasn’t happy that there were no answers. Bobby Roode came in. She tried to dismiss him but he called in what Dixie promised him…a title shot, against Magnus, at Lockdown. She tried to put him off but he would not accept money or any other offers. Bobby gave her a week to figure out where she was going with this. Bobby said there would be no more favors, from him, until this was figured out.

Eric Young talked with ODB. She was concerned about her hubby teaming up with Abyss. She wasn’t sure if Eric could trust Abyss. ODB told Eric that she loved him and there was a reason that they called Abyss “ A Monster”. She walked off and Abyss strolled up. Eric asked Abyss if he was ready. He snorted.

Spud got all brave by saying that his Queen wanted answers and he would get them from The Wolves. Spud then headed to the ring. This is NOT going to be good…for Spud.

Spud tried his best Power Walk to the ring. Vince McMahon, he ain’t. JB and Tenay talked about Spud winning British Boot Camp. Spud insulted the Scottish by calling them “The England B-Team”. Spud was quieted by the chants of “Scotland”. Spud ordered The Wolves to come to the ring. Eddie Edwards and Davey Richards didn’t have to be asked twice. Can’t wait to see The Wolves take on the TNA talent. Spud got all mouthy on The Wolves/ Not a good move. Spud insulted Davey and Eddie for their suits. Spud ordered them to tell him who The Investor was. They refused to answer. Spud took off his Funky Brewster Blue jacket and got right in The Wolves’ faces. Spud talked about being fierce, a lion and a tiger. He made the mistake of slapping one of The Wolves. They took off their jackets and whipped Spud’s annoying little arse. Double Whip. Into the Howling. The fans called for “One More Time”. Spud was told to tell Dixie that she would learn who the Investor was, when everyone else did. It was announced that if anyone interfered in the Main Event, that person or persons would be fired.

The De-Evolution of Joseph Park was then profiled. Joseph Park is Abyss. Joseph and Chris Park are the same person. Eric has been trying to bring back Park’s Monster side. Abyss almost Chokeslammed Eric, last week.

Abyss and Eric Young vs the BroMans
Tag Team Title Match

Zema Ion came out and hit that annoying as Hell whoop siren thing. He intro’d the tag champs. Jessie and Robbie came out to defend. Abyss just stood and sulked. TNA took a quick break before the tag match.

The bell sounded and Robbie with a Whip on Eric. Flair Flop. Shoulder and Slide Under by Eric. Flying Forearm by Young. Abyss with a Goozle. Eric asked him to let go. Jessie with a tag and a Double Club to E.Y.. Shoulder Thrusts by Jessie. Whip into a Float Over. Close Quarters Belly to Belly by Eric. Abyss came into the ring to attack. Eric told Abyss to get out. Jessie went to the eyes. Double Team by the BroMans. Abyss came in and Rang the Bells. Chop Block to Eric. Double Team Stomps by the BroMans.

Zema Ion got involved, choking Eric. 2 count. Keylock by Jessie. Eric Elbowed free and got dropped. Tag to Robbie. Robbie choked Eric on the ropes. Double Back Body Drop failed. Tag to Abyss. Clotheslines all around. Abyss with a Double Splash, in the corner. Abyss knocked both champs out to the floor. Zema Ion got on the to turnbuckle. Goozle by Abyss. The ref got in Abyss’ face. Abyss put the ref in the Torture Rack. Eric tried to talk Abyss out of doing anything to the ref. It didn’t work. Shock Treatment! Eric checked on the ref. Chokeslam to Eric Young. What the heck?

Your Winners (by disqualification): The BroMans
Impact Score: 2.0

Abyss started to leave but Eric called after him. Eric said he knew that Abyss was supposed to be crazy but Eric invented crazy. Eric said he had one experiment left. He challenged Abyss to fight him, next week, in a Monster’s Ball Match! Abyss smiled and said “I’m going to hurt you!” That one is going to be beyond bizarre. Welcome to Insanity!

The Wolves would not let the cameramen get near the new Investor.

Bully Ray was rolling a coffin towards the rign. What was up with that?

Samual Shaw was on a date with Christy Hemme. They went back to his place. She noticed that Shaw was burning his hand on the candle but he acted like it was nothing. There were hidden cameras in the very plain bedroom. Hemme looked out the window. Shaw kissed her and brushed her hair. They came to one room that he didn’t let her into. The room was a shrine to Hemme. Weird to the extreme, to be sure. She is cute but dang.

Bully Ray slowly wheeled the oak coffin down the ramp. Ray walked around the rind and then got inside. He was wearing a Motorhead hoodie (one of my favorite bands). Ray introduced himself to the Scots. Ray talked about what he used to have, until Ken Anderson took it all away. He accused Ken of taking away his life. Ray discussed how he has tried to destroy Ken, including attempts to break Ken’s neck. Ray challenged Ken to a Coffin Match.

Ken Anderson came out to a huge pop. Ray got out of the ring and stood next to the casket. Ken confirmed that Ray wanted to put Ken in the casket. Ray then said he would Piledrive Ken’s wife and kids. Ray made a sexual overtone to the idea of Piledriving Ken’s wife. Ken thought about it for a moment. Ken said everyone was tired of Ray running his mouth. Ken said he would not be going into the casket. Ken said he was going to shut Ray’s mouth. Ken said his wife and kids say “Hi!”. He slammed the lid of the casket into Ray’s face. Ken then got a chair and threw it into the ring. Ken took a Back Elbow but hit a shot to the Nethers. Green Bay Plunge by Ken. Chair Shot to Ray’s ribs. Chair Shot to the back. Bully bailed out to avoid further punishment.

A Cyborg profile of Kurt Angle aired. So cool. So now, he’s The Cyborg Kurt Angle. Forget the Olympic Hero thing.

Backstage, Ethan and Magnus chatted. Magnus didn’t think Ethan was up to his level. He said Ethan was all “Mouth and Muscles”. Magnus didn’t like having a “Green Rookie” as his tag partner in such an important match. The two looked ready to go to blows, until Dixie strolled in. Magnus said “We are as ready as we will ever be”. Dixie wanted Joe and Kurt to be taken out. Dixie told her nephew not to let her down. He was ticked at Dixie’s lack of faith in him.

Magnus and Ethan Carter III vs Kurt Angle and Samoa Joe
Careers-on-the-Line vs World Title Number Contendership Match

Kurt started against Ethan. Collar and Elbow into a Kurt Go Behind. Standing Switch and then back. Ethan into a Side Headlock. Ethan with a Shoulder Tackle. Universal into a Hip Toss and Arm Drag. Tag to Joe. Joe with sharp punches to Ethan. The ref backed off, at warp speed. Corner Rush into the Jumping Enziguri. Joe with Savate Kicks to Ethan’s chest.

Kurt tagged back into Double Shoulder Blocks. Magnus wanted into the match. Kurt stomped away on EC3. JB announced that there would be 3 huge event for 2015 in the UK. Kurt cracked Ethan and punched and kicked at Carter. Kurt charged but struck the ring post. Ethan tagged out to Magnus. In the back, the Investor got out of the limo. WE still couldn’t see who it was.

In the ring, Magnus nailed European Uppercuts and Knife Edge Chops. Impact took a quick break.

Magnus threw Kurt into the corner and tagged out to EC3. Suplex into a Crossface/Arm Bar. The crowd chanted for Joe as Kurt punched his way free. Flying Clothesline by Carter. EC3 threw Kurt into the enemy corner. European Uppercut by Magnus. Magnus taunted Joe as Ethan choked Kurt. The ref didn’t see a thing, of course. Whip by carter. He went for the Elijah Burke Flying Knee but missed. German by Kurt. Tag to Joe and Magnus. Joe with wild Clotheslines and an Inverted Atomic Drop. Big Boot and Backsplash Senton by Joe. Knife Edge Chop and Whip by Joe. Magnus with a kick but Joe with a Snap Powerslm and Cross Armbraker by Joe. EC3 made the save. Ethan got pulled out of the ring by Kurt. Belly to Belly, on the floor, by Kurt. Knife Edge Cop by Joe. Kokina Clutch! Magnus tapped out!

Your Winners: Samoa Joe (new Number One Contender) and Kurt Angle
Impact Score: 3.0

Dixie Carter came out and whined about what had happened. Spud tried to calm her down. Joe taunted the World Champ. He explained that Magnus gambled and lost. Joe and Kurt were going to stay in TNA, for a long time. He also wanted to make sure that Magnus realized the Joe made him tap out. Joe said he would soon get his chance. He told Magnus to shine up His belt because “Joe is gonna kill ya”. Kurt hen took the stick and said it was nights like this that made him enjoy the business. He thanked the fans. Kurt said that last week’s and this week’s victory convinced him that he was back. He told Dixie to bring the checkbook. Kurt said it was time to be rightfully inducted into the Hall of Fame. Kurt wanted to have the new Investor there.

Dixie shrieked about the new Investor. She demanded that the Investor come out. The Wolves came out as the Ticking began…The music hit and the Investor was revealed as…the former MVP! This was the big investor? Seriously? MVP? Not Bischoff…not Hogan…or Sting but MVP? Wow! Can’t wait to see what name the Investor is going to use. I’m sure Vince isn’t going to let TNA get away with using MVP. Shaking head…MVP?

Peace

–Jay Shannon
WordSlingerJay@Gmail.com
Twitter.com/jayshannonnv

Category: Wrestling.

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