WHAT HAPPENED, THIS WEEK, @ (TNA) IMPACT WRESTLING

Posted December 6th, 2013 by jshannon

It’s time to find out who will go to the finals of the (bogus) World Title Tournament. Plus, Ethan Carter III will face a legend with over 30 years in the business. All that, plus Dixie put forth an ultimatum for A.J. Styles to return the World title. Would he?

A bizarre “Metropolis”-like video package opened the show. It ended up highlighting the Final Four of the tournament. Bobby Roode vs Jeff Hardy and Kurt Angle vs Magnus. Those are the Semi-Final Matches. Who would go on to face off in the finals? I know who I think will be there and who I think will take the final win. I’ll explain at the end of the recap.

Kurt Angle came out to the ring. Taz surprised the fans by saying he was choosing Angle to win the title. Kurt talked about being thankful for his health and the fans. Kurt said the World Title Tournament was his path to redemption and worthiness. Kurt asked Magnus to join him in the ring.

Kurt wanted to know what happened, last week. Kurt felt Magnus left him “High and dry against four wrestlers”. Magnus explained having much respect for Kurt. Magnus said he endured a brutal match against Samoa Joe and then hurt his knee in the match. Magnus said he had to make a decision. Kurt said champions work hurt. Kurt was curious if Magnus had the heart of a champion. Magnus said he had heart and hunger to go through anyone and everyone to get his first World title. Kurt did admit that Magnus was his friend but this was about destiny.

Bobby Roode interrupted the discussion. Bobby said he knew the feelings that Magnus and Kurt were dealing with. He also had heart and hunger and a Killer Instinct (great video game). Bobby talked about what he did to James Storm and what he was going to do to Jeff Hardy, in their Tables Match. Bobby said Magnus would never be a World Champ.

Jeff Hardy decided to make it a full house. Hardy came out dragging a table. Hardy was ready to go. Hardy knew how to put people through tables and he was determined to do just that, next.

Jeff Hardy vs Bobby Roode
TNA World Title Tournament, Semi-Finals
Tables Match

The two men danced around and then Bobby with a series of Punches. Bobby added some kicks to the mix. Taz felt this was a match that favored Hardy. Flying Forearm and Inverted Atomic Drop by Hardy. Double Leg Drop by Hardy, followed by a Basement Dropkick. Shoudler Thrusts by Hardy. Bobby reversed a Whip but Hardy with the Float Over and Dropkick to the back. Hardy went to get a table. Bobby Dropkicked the table into Jeff’s face. Bobby punched away, on the floor. Bobby then rammed Jeff’s face into the edge of the ring. Bobby went and got a table. He slid it into the ring and stomped Jeff. Bobby propped the table in a corner. Bobby then picked up Jeff and unloaded with a Knife Edge Chop. Jeff blocked a Hip Toss and so did Bobby. They had a wild little flurry of counters that ended when Bobby took down Jeff with a Clothesline.

Bobby began to lift Jeff, who punched and kicked away. Jeff went for a Whip but Bobby reversed it. Jeff with a Back Elbow and went to the top. He missed Whisper in the Wind and almost put himself through the table. Bobby grabbed Jeff by the hair. Bobby wanted an Attitude Adjustment but Jeff fought free. The two fought on the apron, just above another table. Both men fell off the apron and crashed through the table. Who went through first? The replay showed it was both men going through at the same time. As Brian Hebner tried to figure out what to do, Impact went to break.

The refs were all meeting to try and sort through this to figure out what to do next. Earl Hebner made the final decision to just let the match continue. The crowd loved that. Hardy kicked away but Bobby with the Double R Spinebuster. Bobby then moved the in-ring table. It was announced that the finals would happen on December 19th, at Final Resolution. Bobby with a lifted move but Hardy with the Twist of Fate. Bobby ended up on the table but rolled off before the Swanton. Jeff still hit it, but just went over the table to hit it. Hardy had Bobby on the top turnbuckle. Hardy adjusted the table. Bobby and Jeff both went for Suplexes, but didn’t get them. Bobby went to Suplex Hardy out of the ring. Jeff with a Mule Kick to send Bobby Roode off the apron and through the table!

Your Winner: Jeff Hardy
Impact Score: 3.5 out of a possible 5

Ethan Carter talked about challenging a man who has been in the ring with Legends (Hogan, Andre, Flair, etc…) Who could it possibly be?

Dixie said she got an e-mail from Styles’ camp saying that the title belt was being Fed-Ex’d to her. Dixie was jappy that her holiday was being made.

Ethan Carter III vs ?

EC3 made his entrance. Ethan asked for the stick. He rambled on about all the stars that he has faced. Ethan talked about all the men his opponent had been in the ring with. He said his hand-picked opponent was…Earl Hebner. Seriously?

Ethan Carter III vs Earl Hebner

Earl told Ethan that he was not a wrestler and this match was not going to happen. Ethan insulted Earl by saying his was a subordinate. Ethan said Earl worked for him and his money. Ethan had a special referee for the match. RockStar Spud brought out Brian Hebner, Earl’s son. This gets stupider by the minute. Ethan told Earl to lay down for him to cover him. Ethan kept insulting the whole Hebner family. Earl was ordered to take a dive. Earl got down but then came back up. Ethan threatened to put Earl down, permanently. Earl laid down on the canvas. Ethan the ordered Brian to ring the bell. This is just such a ridiculous waste of time. Fingerpoke of Doom Pin by Ethan. Spud screamed at Brian to make the count.

Your Winner: Ethan Carter III
Impact Score: -5.0

The fans began to chant “BullS**t” Ethan demanded that Brian raise his hand.

TNA looked at the return of Abyss and the exit of Joseph Park. Bad Influence drenched Park in blood, at Turning Point. Kaz and Daniels laughed about what they did. Bad Influence were ready to solve the mystery of Joseph Park and Abyss.

Samuel Shaw and Christy Hemme were at a nice restaurant for a date. Samuel tripped out on the waiter for staring at Christy. Psycho Alert! He seems to have a seriously split personality.

The whole A.J. Styles vs Dixie Carter feud was examined. Styles took the TNA title to Mexico and Japan. He defend in both countries, with honor and style (pun fully intended). Dixie was done with Styles’ games. She ordered the title to be returned, this week, or else. A delivery was made…flowers. She didn’t want them, especially from a fan. She called Spud.

Bobby Roode was irate that he was out because he slipped and fell through the table.

Sting was backstage. Tenay didn’t expect to see The Icon. Sting had something to say, next.

Dixie was in the back to talk to several guys. Dixie said she had another great idea…Feast or Fired. She took credit for that? Christopher Daniels/Curry Man gets his walking papers…again?

Speaking of Daniels, he and Kaz made their way out to the ring. Bad Influence had a manilla envelope with them. Daniels said the fans got very upset with them for what they did to Joseph Park. Daniels said it was time to share the truth.

Joseph Park then came out to the ring. He got in the ring with Bad Influence. They were surprised to see him. Park asked Kaz and Daniels to stop. The crowd chanted for Joseph. Park agreed that Bad Influence won and perhaps Park should have never come to TNA. Park said he should have stayed an attorney. Kaz said they had info about Park’s position as a lawyer. Park ripped up the envelope and what might have been inside. Kaz said the originals of the paper s had been given to the boys in the back. A video aired of Bad Influence, in Chicago. Kaz and Daniels were at the Park, Park and Park law offices. Daniels stormed into what was supposed to be Joseph’s office. The office was totally empty. The office really belonged to a Doctor Prescott, who left a month ago. The secretary tried to find the Law Offices. Turns out that the law offices closed down, 13 years ago.

Back to tonight. Daniels wanted to know what Park has been doing for the last 13 years. Park begged Kaz and Daniels to just leave him alone. Bad Influence refused to let it go. Kaz spat in Park’s face and called him a liar. The duo began to beat on Park but Eric Young rushed down to clear the ring. Eric warned Bad Influence that “The Devil” was about to answer the door. He proposed a match: Bad Influence vs Park and Young, next week.

Sting talked with Magnus and told Magnus that he was proud of where he has gone. Magnus thanked Sting for all his help and motivation. Sting told Magnus to “tear it up” out there. Sting mentioned a bit of jealousy but he was thrilled to watch the match. Magnus had an odd look on his face as Sting left.

Spud found out that the delivery man was in the house.

BroMans vs James Storm and Gunner
World Tag Team Non-Title Match

Jessie and Robbie were introduced by Zema Ion, their DJ. Sad. Storm seemed irritated as he and Gunner came out.

Storm started the match against Jessie. Hip Toss and tag to Gunner. Storm whipped Gunner into Jessie. Face Plant by Storm. Jessie popped Gunner and then bailed out. Tag to Robbie. Gunner punched away as Zema kept hitting the darn horn. BroMans Double Teamed Gunner. 1 count. Jessie with kicks, in the corner. Taz got a shout out, undercover, to Bill “Fonzie” Alfonso. Jessie with an Elbow Drop. Gunner reversed a Whip into a badly done Fallaway Slam. Tag to Storm. Clotheslines by The Cowboy. Flying Forearm by Storm. Into an Inverted Atomic Drop and Flying Neckbreaker. Robbie E got sent out. Code Breaker by Storm. Last Call Superkick on Jessie. Robbie spat beer into Gunner. The distraction kept the ref from counting the pin. The ref tried to stop Gunner, but Gunner pushed the ref aside. DQ win for the tag champs.

Your Winners: Jessie G and Robbie E, The BroMans
Impact Score: 2.0

Sting went to talk to Kurt but was stopped by RockStar Spud. Spud didn’t seem to know who Sting was. Sting also didn’t know who Spud was. Spud wouldn’t let him into the locker room. Spud said Dixie would like him to leave. Sting mocked Spud’s size and said Dixie would have to come and tell him to leave, in person. Such a weasel, that Spud.

Jeremy Borash talked with Gail Kim and her hubby, Robert Irvine. Irvine played up the heel bit by saying they should bring in someone that could actually put up a challenge.

Why do I think this is going to, eventually, end up with the return of Awesome Kong?

Chris Sabin was doing a video thing. He talked about losing in the World Title Tournament. Sabin said he didn’t have faith in himself, after that. Next week, Sabin will fight Austin Aries. Sabin pushed the heel thing by asking “How do WE Look?” Was the “We” him and Velvet Sky or him and his X-Title Belt?

Gail Kim vs Laura Dennis
Kim’s Open Challenge

Kim tore right into Laura. She looked familiar but I couldn’t quite place her. Gail ran Laura into the corner and hit a European Uppercut. Gail dropped Laura but pulled her up. Gail kicked away. Corner Splash by Gail. Gail stomped Laura’s back and hit a Knee Strike. Gail clubbed Laura’s back. Corner kicks by Gail. Drive By Shoulder Thrust by Gail. Gail screamed at Laura but Dennis slapped Gail. Forearms by Dennis. Slider Clothesline by Dennis. 2 count. Double Boots by Gail. Eat Da Feet!

Your Winner: Gail Kim
Impact Score: .25

Gail with a 2nd Eat da Feet, after the match. The ref went off on Gail. Lei’d Tapa with the Tonga Death Grip, up into a Fireman’s Carry. ODB rushed down and beat on both Tapa and Gail. ODB cleared the ring. Tongan Death Grip by Tapa but Gail called her off.

Kurt Angle vs Magnus
TNA World Title Tournament, Semi-Finals
Last Man Standing Match

Taz felt Magnus was in trouble, in this match. Collar and Elbow with a clean break. Bo Behind into a amateur takedown by Kurt. The crowd was solidly behind Kurt. Magnus kicked away from a leg lock. Arm Bar by Magnus. Kurt reversed it. Magnus took it back and rolled them over into a Grapevined Armbreaker. Kurt got to his feet but Magnus kept a Side headlock in place. Back Drop Suplex by Kurt but Magnus would not release his Headlock.

Kurt with the Push Off that led to a Universal. Overhead Belly to Belly by Kurt. The ref started to count Magnus but it was still early. Kurt punched away and went for a Whip. Magnus reversed it and eventually hit a Clothesline. Taz discussed both men’s injuries. Another modified Universal after Kurt escaped a Scoop Slam. Double Clotheslines laid out both men. The ref started making his count. Magnus hit another Clothesline to drop Kurt. Magnus clubbed the neck of Kurt. Impact went to break.

Before going back to the ring, Dixie was in her office. She was ready to open the box with the World Title belt inside. She didn’t open the box.

Back in the ring, Magnus with his Driver. Hat Trick Germans by Kurt. Taz announced that Dixie would show off the World Title belt that she just got back, after this match. Magnus was almost helpless, after so many Germans. I seriously lost count how many Germans he threw. Brian Hebner began the count, again. Kurt Speared Magnus and both men ended up on the floor. Both men got on the apron and Kurt wanted a German, off the ring apron. Magnus threw Back Elbows to escape. Magnus with the Savage Elbow to Kurt’s chest, off the apron. Brian began to count, again.

Magnus threw Kurt back in the ring. Magnus climbed to the top but got caught. Running Superplex by Kurt. Kurt ordered the count to start. Magnus got up at nine. Snap Suplex by Kurt. Kurt went up top and went for the Moonsault. Kurt missed, big time. Kurt may have broken his wrist. Uranage Powerslam by Magnus. Magnus hit another Savage Elbow to Kurt’s chest. Kurt barely made it to his feet. Kurt sent Magnus into the Ref. AngleSlam by Kurt. Bobby Roode rushed in and hit a Clothesline to the back of Kurt’s head. Attitude Adjustment by Bobby. Bobby woke up the ref and he began to count. Magnus got to his feet at the last second but Kurt collapsed. After the match, Roode rushed in and punched away. Jeff hardy came down to stop Bobby.

Your Winner: Magnus
Impact Score: 4.0

Magnus and Hardy shook hands. Dixie was ready to open the box and show off the belt. She ordered Spud to open the box. He cut open the box, only to find a toy belt inside. Dixie lost it at the sight of the fake belt. The show ended with a message from A.J. Styles. He suggested a fake belt for a fake champion. A.J. challenged Dixie to come to Georgia to get the belt back. Styles suggested that Dixie had an enemy…inside TNA.

So it will be Jeff hardy vs Magnus. I said, all along, that Hardy would go to the finals. I think he will win it and bring his oddball Power Rangers belt out of mothballs. That will, eventually, lead to Styles vs Hardy. That match will likely happen on or around Slammiversary, if TNA has any sense in booking.

Well, gang, I’m off for the week-end. Sunday, I’ll be at the Silver Stage Airport as part of the Holiday Fair. I’ll also be there to help my wife celebrate a special birthday. Dianna is the love of my life and I was lucky enough to meet her, five eyars ago. Much love to my wonderful wife.

Peace

–Jay Shannon
WordSlingerJay@Gmail.com
Twitter.com/jayshannonnv

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