WHAT HAPPENED @ THE SLAMMYS AKA MONDAY NIGHT RAW

Posted December 17th, 2012 by jshannon

Welcome to the Slammys!

The WWE Universe will be voting on all the catagories, through the new WWE App. This should be good. Grab some popcorn and a fresh soda and lets get down to it…

Raw is in Philly. I’ve got some great friends in that area. JBL, Michael Cole and Jerry Lawler were the announcers. They talked about A.J. Lee turning on John Cena, last night. They also brought up The Shield’s debut.

Rey Mysterio (w/Sin Cara) vs Damien Sandow (w/Cody Rhodes)

The two locked up and went to the corner. Sandow with hard stomps. Boot up by Rey. Sandow pitched Rey to the outside. Sandow came out and threw Rey into the barrier. Back in the ring, , Sandow with a Side Russian Legsweep and the Elbow of Distain. 1-2- no. Rear Chin Lock by Sandow. Sandow and Rhodes will face Team Hell No, on Wednesday. Sandow with Shoulder Thrusts. Sandow placed Rey on the top rope. Rey blocked the Superplex. Headbutt sent Sandow off the ropes. Seated Senton by Rey. Rolling Hurancanrana and a Basement Dropkick for two. Sandow with a Jumping Spin Neckbreaker off a boot. 2 count. Rey got laid out with a Spinning Slam. 6.1.9.! out of nowhere. Benoit Diving Splash. 1-2-3.

Your Winner: Rey Mysterio
Grade: B+ (87%)

Booker T came out for the first Slammy award of the night. He presented the “Tell Me I Just Did Not Just See That” award. The nominees:

Brad Maddox’s Low Blow on Ryback
The 18 Second Title Loss by Daniel Bryan
Kofi Kingston’s Hand Walk at Royal Rumble
C.M. Punk attacks The Rock and hits the GTS

The Boogeyman returned! Yes! I love it. Cole was tripping out at the return of the worm-chewing superstar. The red fog just drifted all over the place. Raw went to break before the announcement of the winner was made.

Booker said he didn’t just see that. Smile. Brad Maddox came out, expecting to win. It was Kofi Kingston’s Handstand Walk that actually won. Kofi rose his trophy high as he looked at Maddox. Kofi said he didn’t expect to win it. He said he would continue to make the fans say “Wow!”

Kaitlyn vs Eve Torres
Non-Title Match

Kaitlyn ripped into Eve with punches. Eve and Kaitlyn went back and forth with wild punches. Eve bailed out to the floor. Kaitlyn went out and threw Eve into the barrier. She then bounced Eve’s face, over and over, off the barricade. Hard slap by Kaitlyn. Back in the ring, Eve freaked out that her face was attacked. She exploded on Kaitlyn. Irish Whip to the corner. Stomps by Eve. Corner Flying Choke by Eve. Eve pulled Kaitlyn up by the hair. Back Elbows into a Fireman’s Carry Gutbuster by Kaitlyn. 1-2-3!

Your Winner: Kaitlyn
Grade: C (74%)

Kaitlyn laid the belt on Eve and then asked for pictures to be taken.

Comeback of the Year Award was presented by the New Age Outlaws! Sweet! Billy Gunn and Road Dogg came out to the modified “Oh, you didn’t know” intro. Road Dogg welcomed everyone to the Dogg House.

The nominees:

Brock Lesnar
Chris Jericho aka Y2J
D-Generation X
Jerry “The King” Lawler

The Winner, as decided by the fans, was: Jerry “The King” Lawler. That was so obvious. Lawler sprinted up to the podium. He hugged the two guys and said he shouldn’t run like that. He thanked the fans and said it was great to be back. Lawler came back to his spot at the announce table.

Kofi Kingston vs Tensai
Non-Title Match

Kofi with a Dropkick on Tensai. Tensai blocked the Corner Splash and hit a series of Elbow Drops. Headbutts by Tensai. Vader Bomb by Tensai for a two. Kofi avoided the Corner Splash and took out Tensai with Trouble in Paradise.

Your Winner: Kofi Kingston
Grade: C (75%)

That was way too quick for what should have been a good long match. Wade Barrett then rushed out and pulled Kofi off the ropes. He attacked Kofi’s kidneys Wade pushed Kofi into the ring post and then nailed the Bull Hammer Elbow, on the floor.

Michael Cole explained how to download the WWE App. I don’t have that fancy of a phone, so I guess I’ll just have to post my own end year awards, later this week.

Vickie Guerrero came out to present the award for Kiss of the Year:

A.J. Lee and Daniel Bryan
A.J. Lee and Kane
A.J. Lee and C.M. Punk
A.J. Lee nad John Cena

Really? Fans got to vote as Raw went to break. I’m not sure I like this format for voting.

So the winner was obviously A.J. but who would share it with her? Vickie said she would never share an award like this with anyone. So, the winner ended up being: A.J. and Cena. Lee skipped out to the podium. Cena wasn’t with her. Vickie wanted A.J. to explain her actions. A.J. snatched the trophy and said she didn’t need to explain herself. She said she was tired of having to worry what people think about her. Vickie called A.J. a two-bit piece of trash. The two started to argue until Dolph Ziggler came out to break things up. A.J. jumped on Dolph and smooched the bejesus out of him. Vickie shrieked as the two played some serious tonsil hockey. Jeez. Come up for air, will ya? A.J. then skipped, picked up her trophy and bounced to the back.

The Great Khali (w/Natalya) vs David Otunga

Go Behind and Knife Edge Chop by David. Clothesline by Khali. Open Hand Slap to David’s chest, twice. Dang. Irish Whip by Khali but he missed a Big Boot. David went to work on Khali’s left leg. David twisted Khali’s leg in the ropes. Back Elbow by Khali and a Big Boot. Another Clothesline by Khali into the Khali Khop.

Your Winner: The Great Khali
Grade: C (74%)

Nattie danced with Khali. She is just so cute.

Superstar of the Year Award is up next. The presenter will be…Ric Flair? Are you kidding me?

The Nominees:

Sheamus
John Cena
Big Show
C.M. Punk

Even though they kind of blew the surprise, the crowd was still shocked when Ric Flair strolled out onto the stage. He got a standing ovation and looked awesome. Flair did a Foley Pop for Philly. He was ready to give the award to…John Cena! Whoa! That was a shocker. I would have sworn it would have gone to Punk. Cena and Flair hugged and Cena limped to the podium. The crowd was so hostile towards Cena. Cena let the crowd do their thing. Cena talked about what it meant to be Superstar of the Year. There was a loud “C.M. Punk” chant. Cena then gave his award to Ric Flair as the Superstar of All Time. That was cool. Cena left as Flair started to talk…

Out came C.M. Punk and Paul Heyman. You just knew they would show up. Flair didn’t look impressed. Punk said the WWE Universe was stupid. He said it was ridiculous. Punk said it was the worst year of John Cena’s career. Punk said he should be the Superstar of the Year for holding the belt for 393 days. He mocked Flair with the Wooo chant. Flair showed off his Rolex watch. Flair said Punk should leave so they can Rock and Roll. Flair took a shot at “Walrus” Paul Heyman. Flair said he has been watching the WWE. Punk said he could still kick Flair’s *ss with one leg. Flair showed off his two Hall of Fame rings and mentioned his four ex-wives. Flair took off his jacket and walked down to the ring. Is this going to happen? Flair got on the apron and wooed like crazy. Punk started down the ramp and Heyman begged him to stop. Break time.

Ric Flair vs C.M. Punk

I started to subtitle this the “One Legged Man *ss Kicking Contest Match”. Flair held the ropes to help Punk in the ring. Paul Heyman also got in the ring. Flair was ready to go. Punk stabbed at Flair with the crutch and then busted it over Flair’s back. Punk hopped over and got his other crutch. Flair went to Punk’s eyes. Flair put Heyman in the Figure Four! Paul tapped out, big time, and shrieked. Flair let it go and did the Wooo! thing.

Your Winner: No Match but Flair still won
Grade: B (84%)

Flair said he was there to have a good time. Flair told Lawler that he loved him and the world would never lose the two of them. Flair said he either wanted to die in the ring or with a woman from Philly. He was interrupted by the arrival of The Shield. Roman Reigns, Dean Ambrose and Seth Rollins slowly walked towards the ring. Flair told them to come on down. Break time.

Daniel Bryan and Kane came to Ric Flair’s aid. Dean Ambrose laid out Flair and then went after Daniel. The Shield threw Kane into the barricade and then went after Flair. Roman told the announcers to get out of the way. He dismantled the announce table and then Ryback prevented The Shield from unnloading with the Sword of Damacles. Ryback exploded on all three members of The Shield. Kane got back up, as did Daniel Bryan. Ryback dropped Rollins on the announce table. Some moron in the audience took a shot at Ryback and got put on his butt. Flair, Daniel, Kane and Ryback got in the ring and all shook hands. The four men raised their hands in victory. Flair was lifted onto the shoulders of Kane and Ryback. Off to another break.

A ad for the Attitude Era DVD ran. My grandsons really missed out on that time. I’ve shared a few things with them and they get a kick out of it.

Flair talked with Daniel Bryan and Kane. It was a Yes, No, Woo-a-thon. Ron SImmons came up and finished it off with…”Damn”.

Brodus Clay (w/Funkadactyls) vs JTG

Clay launched JTG and hit a Legdrop. Flipping Blockbuster by JTG for two. Rear Chin Lock by JTG. JTG talked trash as he cranked on the Rear Chin Lock. Front Drop into Clotheslines by Clay. Corner Splash by Clay. My Bad (Trapped Leg Suplex). Huge Headbutt into the Jurassic Splash.

Your WInner: Brodus Clay
Grade: C (74%)

Santino Marella and Tensai came out to present the LOL award. Tensai tripped, ala Shockmaster. Tensai had an ice bag taped to his head. Too funny. Santino couldn’t help but chuckle at Tensai. Santino called him “Albert”. He called Tensai “Fat Albert”. Tensai broke character and spoke English. The nominees:

The Rock going off on Cena’s merchandise
Team Hell No’s Anger Management Classes
Randy Orton throws scalding chili on Ricardo and then slamming Matt Striker into a cake
Vickie Guerrero tries to dance against Brodus Clay

Miss Piggy was looking for Kermit but found Flo Rida. Piggy flirted with Flo. They will both be at Tribute to the Troops. Flo took off as Piggy talked about her luggage.

So the LOL moment ended up being: The Rock’s rant on Cena’s stuff. Santino said The Rock was not there. Super-loud boos. Santino accepted it on Rock’s behalf. Daniel Bryan rushed out and started screaming “No”. Kane came out to calm him down. Daniel knew the Slammy should have been his. Kane carried him to the back.

Sin Cara vs Cody Rhodes.

The two went to the corner. Cody punched away. Backspring Elbow by Cara. Rope Flip Arm Drag by Cara. Cody bailed out to the floor. Cara with a Flip Dive to take out Cara. Rey protected Cara from Damien Sandow. Cody stomped on Cara as they got back in the ring. Stall Front Drop Suplex by Cody for two. Kneelift by Cody into a Snap Mare. Step-Over Arm Bar by Cody. Cody stomped Cara in the face. Cody with hard punches. He then stood on Sin Cara’s throat. 2 count.

JBL took shots at Dusty Rhodes’ polka dots. Cody with a kick and Irish Whip. Cara crumbled in the corner. Cody stood on Cara’s face. Cara with an Enziguri. Springboard Missile Dropkick by Cara. Flying Hurancanrana by Cara. Cody blocked a Wheelbarrow Slam and connected with the CrossRhodes.

Your Winner: Cody Rhodes
Grade: B (85%)

Zack Ryder came out with Layla. It was time to announce the next award. #TrendingNow of the Year Award. The nominees:

#FeedMeMore
#PeoplePower
#LittleJimmy
#wwwyki (woo woo woo you know it)

The fans were back to voting and I’m off to the kitchen for some ice for my diet creme soda

So the Slammy went to…#FeedMeMore. Zack said he would go to the back and deliver the award to Ryback.

Big Show came out with that huge chair that he took out Sheamus with, last night. Hell, I’d love to have a huge chair like that when I’m working on my horse’s (Lacey’s) hooves. Show wasn’t happy that he wasn’t the Superstar of the Year. It was off-set because he was still the World Champ. Show wondered if Sheamus…he stopped to berate the audience for their disrespect. They started to chant “Boring” and Show had a fit. Sheamus then came out and the crowd woke up. New graphic for Sheamus. Sheamus got in the ring and confronted Show. He said he was not there to fight. He just wanted to say that he had no regrets for their match at TLC. Sheamus admitted that Show was the better man on Sunday. Sheamus said Show deserved to be the World Champ. He wanted to shake Show’s hand. The two shook hands. The fans actually booed the good sportsmanship. Show called Sheamus a potato-eating Irishman. Sheamus exploded on Show after the insults. Sheamus attacked Show with the super-sized steel chair. He just waffled the World Champ and hit the Brogue Kick. Sheamus’ music hit and the Irishman took off. Come on, Dolph. Get to the ring, doofus.

Here comes Dolph. He went to cash in but John Cena ran down and took out Dolph. Cena threw Dolph into the barrier, in several places. Dolph still has the briefcase, since the ref never rang the bell. The announcers talked about what happened at TLC, which kept Cena from winning the Money in the Bank Briefcase. A.J. turned on Cena.

Dolph Ziggler stormed up to Vickie and complained that Cena just cost him the World title. Vickie went off on Dolph about TLC and the kiss, earlier. Vickie wanted to know how Dolph got A.J. to help him. Dolph said the relationship between him and Vickie was over. Dolph accused Vickie of being jealous, old and ugly. Bad move, monkey boy. She made the match of John Cena and Vickie vs Dolph and A.J.. Wow.

Heath Slater, Jindar Mahal and Drew Mcintyre (3MB) vs Alberto Del Rio, The Miz and Tommy Dreamer!

Miz talked about using the Brooklyn Brawler, Sunday. They brought out my favorite wrestler of all time. ADR tore into Drew . Flying Enziguri. Tag to Dreamer. My orange cat, Tommy Dreamer, just woke up as the “Tommy Dreamer” chant just went off. Heath took the tag and talked trash. He called Tommy fat and shoved him. Tommy did a little shimmy and then cracked Heath. Flapjack. Mosh Pit breakdown. 3MB were all sent to the floor. Suicide Dive by ADR. Miz with a Baseball Slide. Tommy with a Crossbody off the top rope. Sweet. Break time

I have to think Dreamer may be going into the Hall of Fame. He so deserves it. He’s been a top performer in ECW, WWE and TNA. I’m also thinking Mick Foley, Diamond Dallas Page and a few others. Think I need to update my predictions.

My family has officially banished me to my office to watch the rest of the show. I guess I’m getting a little too wound up. Why did my wife just offer me an extra blood pressure pill? Oh, duh.

Back Drop Suplex by Dreamer on Mahal. Heath and Miz tagged in. Clotheslines by Miz into a Back Body Drop. “This is Awesome!” rant out. Miz attacked both Heath and Mahal. Heath knocked Miz to the floor and Mahal attacked. Heath threw Miz back in the ring and got a two count. Whip by Heath and tag to Drew. Snap Suplex by Drew. Arm Bar by Drew. Miz and Drew traded shots. Sunset Flip by Miz for two. Tag to Mahal. Kicks to Miz’ds chest. Kitchen Sink Assisted by Mahal (and Drew) for two. JBL brought up Ravi Shankar (God rest his beloved soul). Reality Check by Miz on Mahal.

Heath with a tag. He stopped Miz from tagging out. Front Face Lock by Heath. Heath Bum Rushed Miz to the enemy corner. Tag to Drew. He stopped Miz from punching out. Triple Team by 3MB, in the corner. The announcers had fun making jokes about country music. Scoop Slam reversed by Miz into a School Boy. Heath held Miz’s leg and pulled him back to the 3MB corner. Mahanl with a tag and Jumping Elbow Drop. Mahal choked Miz on the ropes. Heath with a kick to Miz’s face. Springboard Kneedrops by Mahal. Tag to Drew.

Fireman’s Carry into a strut by Drew. Over the Head drop by Drew for two. Drew stomped on Miz’s hand. Tag to Heath. Punch by Heath. 2 count. Rear Chin Lock by Heath. Heath popped Dreamer. Tag to Alberto. Clotheslines into a Tilt-a-Whirl Backbreaker. ADR with a Superkick to Heath’s face. Save by Mahal. Miz took out Mahal, and himself. Heath blocked the Cross Armbreaker. Step-Up Enziguri by ADR. Dreamer begged for the tag. He got it. Monster pop. DreamerDT!

Your Winners; Tommy Dreamer, Alberto Del Rio and The Miz
Grade: A- (92%)

Sheamus then came out to give out the next award.He said he enjoyed beating Show with the chair. He then gave a nod to Tommy Dreamer. Sheamus talked about winning Newcomer of the Year, three years ago. He sent it to the nominees

Antonio Cesaro (my pick)
Brodus Clay
Damien Sandow
Ryback

The winner was Ryback. That figures. The former Skip Sheffield came out to a mediocre pop from the Philly crowd. Ryback did a shout out to the late Owen Hart. Ryback said he was the change that Hart used to talk about.

Ryback vs Antonio Cesaro
Non-Title Match

Cesaro rambled on about the voting being rigged. He was not happy that he didn’t get Newcomer of the Year. He talked about how much better he was than Ryback. Antonio with an Uppercut. Reverse Irish Whip into a Thesz Press by Ryback. The two traded fists. Antonio with a Float Over and European Uppercut. Ryback witha Walking Stall Suplex on Antonio. 2 count. Ryback with a Shoulder Thrust and Irish Whip. Boot into a pure power lift by Cesaro. Cesaro went for the Neutralizer but Ryback with a Back Body Drop and Spinebuster. Antonio rolled out of the ring and got his US title Belt. Ryback pressed Antonio up into the ring. Cesaro went to the back and took the count-out loss. Coward.

Your Winner (by count-out): Ryback
Grade: B- (80%)

“Mean” Gene Okerlund came out with Ricky “The Dragon” Steamboat. They were joined by Jim Ross. They brought up Match of the Year:

Undertaker vs Triple H, Wrestlemania, Hell in a Cell
Brock Lesnar vs John Cena, Extreme Rules
Big Show vs Sheamus, Hell in a Cell
The Rock vs John Cena, Wrestlemania

The votes were in and the award went to…

Undertaker vs Triple H! HHH’s music hit and the Cerebral Assassin returned to a deafening pop. HHH shook hands and hugged all three presenters. The crowd just gave the sound engineer a ringing in his ears that will be there for three days. HHH joked about winning Best Hair back in 97. The crowd screamed “We want Taker!” HHh went silent and then started over. He said the match was magical. He talked about Undertaker and Shawn Michaels. HHH said it was an honor to be in such a match. “Thank you, Hunter!” rang out. He said “Thank you” to the fans. HHH said the fans have not seen the last of the Undertaker!

In the back, The Shield assaulted Tommy Dreamer. They said this was The Shield’s house. Ricardo Rodriguez got taken out by The Shield. Refs and others rushed The Shield out. Dreamer complained about his back being hurt.

A.J. Lee and Dolph Ziggler vs John Cena and Vickie Guerrero
Never Say Never, Mixed Tag Match

A.J. asked for a ladder and climbed it as Raw took a quick break.

Tomorrow night, USA Network will run a commercial-free Smackdown. Wednesday, Tribute to the Troops will air. A.J. was way the Hell up at the top of the ladder. She said she was full of surprises. She said everyone kept asking her why did she do what she did. She said people at a gas station and a busboy at the hotel asked her why. Even other Divas asked her why she turned on Cena and why she smooched Dolph. Lee said it should be obviously. Vickie Guerrero interupted A.J.. She said no one cars why Lee did what she did. The two women stared each other down as Dolph arrived. Lee smiled at the Show Off.

The men began the battle. Dolph ducked Cena and strutted. Cena with a Single Leg Takedown on Dolph. The crowd was divided in their chants. Back Drop Suplex by Cena. Tag to A.J.. Lee sasheyed up to Cena and smiled. Vickie rushed in and went after A.J. like a tiger on steroids. Lee bailed out of the ring and headed up the ramp. Dolph jumped Cena. Dolph rolled Cena back in the ring and stomped away on Cena. Dolph then turned to stare at Vickie. She got off the aprona nd started up the ramp. Corner Splash by Dolph missed but he hit a huge Jumping DDT. 2 count. Elbow Drops by Ziggler. Ziggler missed a Super Kick. That let Cena clamp on the STF. A.J. brought out a huge guy name Big E Langsto, from NXT. Monster Cutter! Holy crap!

Your Winer: No Contest
Grade: B- (80%)

Fade Out.

Peace

–Jay Shannon
JesseCShannon@att.net

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