Twas The Night Before Christmas
(A Wrestling Version)
By Lady B from NYC!
Twas the night before Christmas and all through the ring,
not a person was present, and you couldn’t hear a thing.
The stockings were hung all around the arena, waiting for Santa to fill them…NOT Cena.
Superstars and Divas nestled in hotel beds, while dreams of titles and movie deals danced in their heads.
McMahon in his mansion and we in homes he’d find cheap, have all settled down for a long winter’s sleep.
When up on the roof there arose a huge noise.
So the nightguard patrolled with such stealth and such poise.
Away without sound the guard went to the window, to see what came out of the wind and the snow.
The moon high above the arena building did glow, and gave a sight of the ground that only high flyers know.
The guard saw a sight his eyes thought to protest.
A sleigh pulled by reindeer…who appeared to need a ‘test’.
And the driver, a man, who looked lively and quick. The guard said to himself, “HELL YEAH! It’s St. Nick!”
More dashing than Rhodes with more game than The Game, he went on to announce each reindeer by name:
“Now Nasher! Now Ryder! Now Primo and Vickie! On Booker, On A-Ry, On Ziggler and Hemme!
To the top of the building to the arena below, pull this sleigh harder than creative write shows!”
And then in split seconds, the guard heard on the roof, the thumping and pounding of each quite huge hoof.
As he drew in his head, and was turning around, down the air-ducts St Nicholas came with a bound…for christmas glory!
He was dressed in red gear from his head to his foot. His clothes were all filthy with ashes and soot.
He flung his red bag onto his shoulders and back. He looked like Lex Luger putting someone in the Torture Rack.
His eyes had a twinkle like rookies new to the roster. His cheeks like JR, his button-nose like King Lawler.
His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow. And the beard of his chin was as white as Sheamus ,you know?
The stump of a pipe he held tight in his teeth. Smoke encircled his head like a heel getting heat.
He had a broad face and a little round belly, that shook when he laughed, like Kharma pounding Kelly Kelly
He was chubby and plump, a right jolly old elf.
The guard laughed when He saw him, in spite of himself.
A wink of his eye and a twist of his head, soon had the guard knowing he had nothing to dread.
He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work.
He filled all the stockings, with a Nature Boy smirk.
Once finished , he set his finger aside of his nose. And giving a nod, up the air-duct he rose!
He flew to his sleigh, and told his team to hustle. So away they flew down like Cena’s five knuckle shuffle.
The guard heard him announce as he drove out of sight,
“Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good-night!”
Merry Christmas from
LADY B at
THE DIVA LOUNGE!!!!
***Please tune in on Monday December 19th at 6:30pm EST/5:30pm CST to catch Lady B on the web-radio show WRESTLE TALK with Radio Nick and Devan Scott at www.radiorichandfriends.com!!! Just click Listen Live once you go to the site at 6:30pm EST/5:30pm CST***